twenty-five seconds of silence

it almost went down

so after dinner at pasta pomodoro last night, i walked by myself to the parking lot. i couldn't remember where i parked, so i started pressing my car alarm button, listening intently to my car's honking sound. i heard it somewhere among all the cars, and next to it, there were a bunch of white hoodlum-like thugs cursing and stuff. when i pressed my alarm's button for the last time, one of the guys was like, "stop fucking honking, bitch!" i got really scared. when i walked up, they stared at me, and i said meekly, "sorry, i didn't know where i parked." i was expecting them to beat me up or something, but one of the other guys apologized, "sorry, my friend is being an asshole." i felt better, and they didn't give me any trouble. *phew* something terrible could have gone down.

so my evil thought of the day: i walked by a female coworker (who's not in my division), and i thought, "you look like a man." remember, i think these things to see if there are any telepathic people around me. ugh. one of these days, i'm going to come across a telepath, and i'm going to get my ass kicked. i swear, it's a tourettic thing, this evil-thought-thinking thing i do. it's like mental copralia.

so the bad news i got over the weekend is that my friend amyM isn't going to stop by the bay area before she goes to hong kong for a year. i was really bummed out about it when she told me yesterday. i haven't seen her since 2003. i'm making a last ditch effort to see if i can fly her out this coming weekend. (she leaves for HK mid-july, so this is the last weekend possible.) i checked for tickets on travelocity, and they're not super-expensive yet. we'll see if i can make this happen.

i'm not looking forward to tomorrow morning. i have to get up at 7:30am to take my car into the tire shop. and then, i have to face a 2-3 hour wait. i was planning to walk all the way to best buy (maybe a 1-2 mile walk) to look for a bluetooth headset, but i don't think they'll be open that early. i'll definitely walk to mcdonald's to have breakfast, and we'll see where i go from there. there's a krispy kreme across the way, so maybe i'll grab my first donut in a long while. let's hope they're fresh.

lately, i've been having a really easy time falling asleep. (*knocks on wood*) it's a good thing. i mean, it takes less than 20 minutes to fall asleep, and i don't even remember turning off the tv at night. it's great. i used to have horrible insomnia, and it got so bad that i used to have to knock myself out with some xanax. but now, sleep has been great. yay! the only problem is that since slumber comes so easily, i haven't been keeping up with sportscenter, and my knowledge of the sporting life has been diminished.

so today, i went with ben to a thai restaurant on murphy street that nelson recommended. it's called siam taste, and they have jun pad poo. it was horrible. it didn't taste like jun pad poo, and it was just really gross. they even threw in bean sprouts, which i abhor. i was so upset with my meal that i promised myself i would never go back there again. thai basil is the way to go if you want thai food on murphy street. *pukes*

here's a little OCD thing that you might find amusing: every time i smoke on the office steps, i have to see an insect. meaning, i have to sit there and find an insect on the concrete around me in order to feel "satisfied." sometimes, it takes a while, because ants aren't always out, so when i finally find one, i *thank* the ant or whatever it is. weird, huh?

amyM saw thievery corporation in concert the other day. i am SO jealous. TC are one of the pioneers of lounge music, this phase that i was big into a few years ago. i would absolutely love to see them in concert, although since their music is electronic, i'm not quite sure what there is to see. would they just be sitting behind keyboards or computers? *ponder* but yeah, their stuff is awesome, although i'm more enamoured with their older stuff. if you want to check out their stuff, i would recommend their album _sounds from the thievery hi-fi_. it's brilliant shit.

why do people get grouchy when they're hungry? my friend jeremy gets that way. and last night, i was talking to grace, and she said she also gets very irritable when she's hungry. and adam, too. i remember that one time we saw the cocoa and cadaver exhibits, and afterwards, we went to this mediterranean place, and he was starving, so he just sat there, not talking to anyone because he was a bit snappy. rae kept patting his head telling him to calm down because food was coming soon. it was a curious sight. :)

when i went to take a leak today, there was a guy already at one of the urinals. interestingly, the moment i walked into the bathroom, he flushed. and then, he kept on going, and when he finished, he flushed again. so... why flush the first time? because he was embarrassed of the tinkling sound? because there was odor? i'm baffled.

one of my friends want to install a urinal in his home's bathroom. that would be cool. but if i had one, i still probably wouldn't use it because of the splashing. like i said, sometimes my pee stream goes haywire, like 90 degrees off line, onto my shoes and hands and the floor and stuff. it's nuts. sometimes i pee in two streams, too, or the two streams coil around each other like a caduceus. ah, the wonderful world of having a schlong.

oh! i bought fruit for the first time in my life the other day! yup, i walked into safeway, and i bought a few peaches, pears, kiwis, and bananas. now the trick will be to see if i eat them before they spoil. so far, i've only eaten a peach. i was going to eat a banana yesterday, but i got home too late, and i wasn't hungry for fruit by the time i got back from _wall-e_. the most difficult fruit to eat will be the kiwis because i have to cut them and wash the knife and spoon and stuff. we shall see.

i've talked to some people on the east coast, and i definitely take for granted the quality of the produce we have out here in california. i've heard that places like new york have really shitty fruits and vegetables. so i will try to be thankful that we have what we have, and i will savor the fruits that i'm able to buy here on the west coast.

i am out of cigarettes. yup. on my drive home, i will not be able to have my usual leaving-the-office smoke. what a difficult break in my routine for such an OCD-charged person. so you know the first place i'm going to go is the gas station to buy my cancer sticks. i tried going last night to my usual valero gas station, but i have no idea that it wasn't a 24-hour place, so it was closed. boo. let's hope i don't go through withdrawal and get all jittery and stuff. instead of my cigarette, i'm going to have an altoid on the way home; that usually works to calm me down when i get a nicotine craving.

ok, time to wrap things up at the office. ciao!

mission accomplished

ah, so i saw all three of my targeted movies this weekend.

friday night, i had dinner at barn thai with paul, leeya, mikeC and nelson. barn thai's not the best thai place, but the meal was surprisingly satisfying. i got my jun pad poo fix, but the dish was actually the least impressive of the bunch that we ordered; there was little crab, not enough garlic, and it was overall very bland.

afterwards, i rushed to the office to write out a check to ricky and jo-ann (that's where i keep my checkbook), and i met D at AMC mercado to watch _get smart_. the movie was silly and dumb, but i soaked in my first anne hathaway experience. her makeup was very thick (lots of eyeliner), but i still think she's very pretty. i will try to watch more of her movies. which ones do you recommend?

saturday, i got up at 9:40 or so on my own volition. crazy. i watched some tv, and then i started calling around for lunch when the time came. a lot of people were occupied, but luckily, peter gave me a ring, and i joined him and some of his med school friends for lunch at queen house. i got the pork and leek dumplings, and they were great. afterwards, they all went to costco (mass trip!), and i went back to prepare for the wedding reception.

i wore that beautiful $100 club monaco shirt (blue stripes, white collar, white cuffs), and i paired it with a pair of black dkny pants. we had a van of 7 people, and here's the crazy pick up schedule: barden came to my place at 2:30, and we drove to lacona and cisco's place. will caltrained it down, and lacona picked him up before. then, we drove to SF to pick up vidya, and then we drove a few blocks to pick up dishi. and after that, we finally headed to sacramento. we played a movie game, and that passed the time very quickly.

the reception was at new canton restaurant on broadway, located right next to an adult video stores. classy. the food was decent (they had peking duck!), but the highlight was definitely seeing jo-ann and ricky again. it had been four years since i last saw them, and it was a wonderful sight to catch them walking through the door. i'll post pictures when i process my photos (yes, i was lazy this weekend).

we got back past midnight, and i crashed pretty hard. but i woke up just past 10am on sunday. i had brunch with paul and leeya at hobee's (surprisingly good omelette), and then i went home to take a nap. i saw _wanted_ with alan and ting at 5:20pm at mercado. the movie was mildly entertaining, but i didn't think that much of it. curve the bullet! whatever.

right after i got out of the movie and turned on my cell phone, i got a voice mail from john about dinner at santana row's pasta pomodoro at 7:30. so i jetted over there and had a nice meal there with john, grace, nelson and mikeC. ah, the gemelli dish. *yum* after that, grace expressed interest in seeing _wall-e_, so we went to AMC cupertino village for a 9:50pm showing.

i really wanted to fall in love with the movie, but in the end, i have to say that my expectations were let down. i really loved the main character, but the ending was a bit chaotic for me. but overall, i did think it was a pretty decent pixar film, and it held my interest. i don't think i'd see it again, though.

overall, a good weekend. my brain is a bit friend from seeing three movies, though; i don't think i'll do that again in the near future. :)

triple threat

so i want to see three movies this weekend: _get smart_ (seeing it tonight at 9:30), _wanted_ (planning on seeing it on sunday with alan, jay and the gang), and _wall-e_ (maybe sunday night?). we'll see if it happens. by the way, does anybody see multiple movies on a single ticket? it seems pretty easy to do, since i've never seen a movie theater person check for that. and it's quite an economical solution, too, since movies are really expensive these days.

re: propinquity. so my theory is that the two involved don't have to really have much attraction to each other. i mean, they can't be super-repulsive, deformed, ultra-racist, or anything. but basically, you throw two people together, and have them spend a lot of time together (like have them be roommates, neighbors, or in _sytycd_'s case, dance partners), and they will eventually hook up. it's just that they will eventually form a bond because of all that contact. i've seen it happen, firsthand, too, and sometimes it's inevitable. i guess we humans have a need to be with someone, or just anyone.

i had a huge, HUGE hankering for mongolian bbq today. i was based on the expectation that i was going there today with some ex-coworkers, so i was looking forward to it since yesterday. but that fell through, so i ended attending the free lunch at my company, this 4th of july bbq. the food was pretty bad, and i was really cross after the meal. oh well. i'll try to plan on going to su's sometime next week to satisfy my mongolian craving. it's expensive now, so i can't go there that often.

i got up today at 9:30am on my own volition. no alarm clock, nothing. i think i did so because i was in the middle of a dream where my mom was forcing me to read this religious literature, and i woke up like, "i don't like this dream! i'm getting out of it." so i just got up. haha. i also had this dream where these huge 20-ft waves were crashing against my windows. it was really scary.

my morning song: "tattoo" by jordin sparks. this is yet another song with random yelps in it, a la what timbaland does in songs such as "say it right" by nellie furtado and "apologize" by one republic. i don't know what's causing this trend, having songs with voices used as non-word-like instruments. i think it's interesting, but sometimes it gets a little annoying.

so i'm not looking forward to next tuesday. i have to be at the tire place by 8am, and i have to wait there anywhere from two to three hours while they install, mount, and align my tires. ugh. what the fuck am i going to do during that time? there's a mcdonald's and krispy kreme near there, so i guess i can have breakfast, and even further away, a best buy, so maybe, if i'm up for a trek, i can go buy a bluetooth headset for my phone, but man, that's a lot of walking. i guess i have the time to do it. i hate waiting. if it weren't so early in the morning, i'd call up D and have him pick me up, but then, he'd have to take me back there within a few hours to retrieve my car. nah, best not to bother him.

do female porn stars get excited during their sex scenes? i can never tell. i mean, you don't see the guys' schlongs glistening with the girls' juices, so that tells me that they're not that turned on. or maybe, they're just not the "super-moist" type of girls. some of the girls i've been with got so wet that you could hear a liquidy slurping noise during sex. now that's a big turn-on. one girl once told me that she was so un-into sex with an ex of hers that sex used to hurt because she was so dry. i find that really sad and upsetting. fyi, if i ever find a girl dry, i'd get her into the mood with some nice muffdiving; that always seems to work wonders.

my morning dumps of late have been very large. i've had to flush twice for the last few days. maybe it's because i've been eating a lot recently. last night, i met up nelson, geoff and pak at the palo alto pizza chicago (instead of the usual santa clara one), and i really liked the fact that that location seemed to use more marinara sauce on their pizza's. however, nelson stated that their "great chicago fire" pizza wasn't as flavorful, and i hypothesized that it was because they didn't put as much chopped garlic on it. but still, it was an awesome meal, probably because i didn't have lunch and was starving by the time we ate.

i am sad that ana ivanovic lost at wimbledon today. my friend J introduced me to her, and i've been a fan ever since. she's probably the cutest (which to me, is a big COMPLIMENT) tennis player out there right now, imho. i was looking forward to catching one of her matches during the weekend, or even in the finals (after all, she's ranked #1 right now), but sigh, i guess it's not to be. the only thing i don't like about her is how she pumps her fist too often, even during rather insignificant points.

yes, i do consider "cute" a big compliment. like i said, cute says that there is something different about a girl, out of the ordinary from the rather bland "pretty." anybody can be pretty, but cute is quite special. yes, cindy, i understand your points, but i guess we (and everybody, i guess) has different definitions. but i do know that a lot of girls are offended by being called cute, so i will have to be careful with that word.

an example of a quirky personal definition of a word is "hot." for me, "hot" can only be used to describe tall girls. short girls can't be hot. yes, it's a little odd, i know. take ivanovic, for example, she is cute, yes. but i also consider her hot because she happens to be 6'1". on the flip side, natalie portman is beautiful, but i cannot call her hot because she is apparently very short. so there you go.

the stock market is fucking killing me.

so i finally get to wear my beautiful $100 club monaco shirt tomorrow. i bought it on a whim like a year ago when my coworkers and i went shopping at valley fair after a lightning quick lunch at arby's one weekday. i saw it, and i said, "i must have this." i didn't care how much it was. it's deep blue with vertical stripes, and it has a white collar. i am struggling with what color pants to wear it with (any suggestions?), but yes, i will wear it tomorrow to jo-ann and ricky's wedding reception. nothing will stop me.

i feel bad. i missed D's birthday back in april. he never mentioned that it was his birthday. while he was out of his cube, i fished his wallet out of the tray in his cubicle, and i pulled out his driver's license. april 14th. shit. i would have gladly taken him out to lunch or something, but now i have to wait another 10 months. sigh. i pride myself on acknowledging my friends' birthdays, so this made me sad.

all right. time to get out of here. have a STUPENDOUS weekend folks!

vanning to sacramento

so it looks like i might not have to drive to sacramento after all. there are five of us going now, and it'll be a tight fit in my car, so my friend lacona volunteered her 7-seater van. i think that'll be the best option, since i'm a little paranoid about my tires bursting on the 80 and us being stranded in the middle of nowhere. so that means... i can drink! well, at least a little more than my planned one whiskey, assuming they even have that. the dinner is at a cantonese restaurant, so they might not have a full bar there.

my tires shipped today. i'm gonna call up the tire shop tomorrow and see if i can get them switched out in the afternoon. like i said, paranoid. when i set my mind on something, i get obsessive. many years ago, my mom was driving on the 75 in dallas, and her tire popped, and she spun around 360 degrees on the highway and crashed into a pile of dirt on the side. had that pile of dirt not been there, she probably would have died or something, that's what she said. so yeah, i'm worried about my safety.

speaking of my mom, i just talked to her. she's trying to teach my cousin alex some basics in computer science. she was having a hard time explaining simple concepts like files, variables, loops, etc. i guess if you have never had any experience with the stuff, the concepts can be very foreign. i am very grateful that PC's came about when i was a kid, and my dad let me tinker around with BASIC at a very early age. i started writing programs when i was in late elementary school (i think, or maybe it was junior high), and my high school was good enough to offer AP computer science I and II. so computer science is very natural to me now.

i was writing alex (not my cousin, but my college buddy) about how come people don't get alarmed when they gain a lot of weight. i mean, when you break, say, the 300 pound barrier, doesn't that trigger some alarms? like, maybe you should seek medical help? when i was at jay's bachelor party in vegas and stepped on the scale at the bellagio suite bathroom, i saw that i was 202. i pretty much freaked out. so i started dieting the moment i came back. remember that weight loss bet i made with J, that involved trading naked pictures of ourselves? yeah, that was when that happened. i eventually came down to 155 at my lightest, and now i'm hovering around 170. but my point is, i did something about it.

i got scratched pretty badly at basketball today. during the first game, R fouled me, and he ran his fingernail down the length of my forearm, and i have a 3-inch gash, part of which is bleeding. ugh. i hope he doesn't have any communicable disease. basketball is a rough sport. btw, the NBA draft is tonight; i hope stanford twins robin and brook lopez get drafted high, and i am looking forward to seeing them play professionally. i wonder if they'll be sad to finally be separated from each others. man, i'm gonna miss them, and dude, we (meaning the stanford men) are gonna suck next year.

i'm finding that it's easier to get up earlier these days. i wake up at like 8:30 or so, and i feel refreshed. however, after i force myself to sleep more, i feel groggy when i finally do get out of bed. hm. one of the reasons why i don't just get up earlier is that i don't want to go to work that early, and the other reason is that i don't want to smoke more. (the more time i spent awake, the more cigarettes i smoke.) but hm. maybe going to work more would be a good thing; we had a meeting today, and i have quite a number of tasks to tackle for our next chip.

remember last summer, when i had that early phase of getting up at 7:30-8:30? that was really weird; i don't know what happened to me. i remember that i would get up, check e-mail, listen to music, and watch _dawson's creek_ before heading into the office. sigh. dawson's creek. what a great show (at least the early episodes were good).

speaking of that show, did i mention that there's a katie holmes poster floating around the office? i bought it way back when (i had such a HUGE crush on her), around 1999-2000, and after i left the company, i gave it to william. then, through the years, it's been handed down to various employees, and now it's in D's cube. yes, it's still intact, although there's a little bit of wear on it. this week, a new guy (from cal) who joined us, so there's a little discussion as to whether or not he should inherit the poster. haha. the katie holmes poster lives!

i own several dozen posters. i used to be a big decorator of my dorm room and office cubicle. i had several gigantic wall posters; subjects included NIN, oasis, KMFDM (a german, i think, industrial band), _reservoir dogs_. i was known in my previous companies for having the cubicle with the most personality. but when i moved into ada with alan, i somehow "grew up" and started decorated with photo frames and framed art. *shrug* i guess i had to graduate to more refined stuff someday, huh?

so the california cell phone law takes into effect next week. i need to head over to best buy and pick up a jawbone bluebooth headset. (alan tells me that jawbone is a good brand.) even though i think it's inconvenient, i actually think the law is a good idea. i can say that i've been distracted by talking on the cell while i'm driving, and it's best that i keep both hands free when drive (even though most of the time, i drive with one hand). fyi, the first offense will be a $100 ticket. that's pretty steep!

so i was watching _sytycd_ last night, and i was wondering if partnering with a girl for an extended period of time would make me have feelings for her (assuming the girl is attractive). i mean, you're spending a lot of time with her, and you're doing all this intimate stuff with her (especially a dance like the rumba or tango). i've often seen a dance like that and thought to myself "i bet they're sleeping together." ha! i mean, it's the theory of propinquity, right?

not going into too many details, i have fallen prety to the theory of propinquity myself. i.e., spending a lot of time with a girl, doing activities together, seeing her practically every day, things just happen, and we eventually hooked up. it's a natural and almost inevitable process. but the thing is, i don't know how strong these relationships are, because they may be based solely on perpetuated contact; like, if you stop seeing the person, the bond that you have may melt away. did you really have something in common? or was the relationship simply (and weakly) built solely on repeated exposure?

ok, enough talk. i need a smoke. i'm getting a massage today! *huzzah*

new tires

so i ordered new tires for my car today from tirerack.com. i originally ordered a set of tires that was on backorder, and then i called up customer service, and they told me that of all their 5 warehouses, they only had two in stock. so i changed (in haste) the order, and then i spent a good amount of minutes reading the reviews of the tires. they were horrible, so i called them up (yet again) and switched the tires to a set of much better ones. i felt a bit guilty causing such a hassle, but then again, *i* am the one spending over $400 on the stuff, so in the end, i got peace of mind that i am putting my car (and my life) on four good, solid, safe tires. don't skimp on tires, man, that's all i can say.

in other news, i had been searching for this one friend of mine, ann. the last time i talked to her was like 15 years ago. so early last month, i e-mailed my aunt in dallas, and asked if she remembered ann's parents. she didn't have a recollection of the girl, but she deduced that her mom must be this certain real estate agent, so i googled the mom, and i found her realty website. i e-mailed her, but i got no response. well, today, i finally got off my ass and called the mom, and after some phone tag, i finally talked to her. yup! she is indeed ann's mom, so i got her digits and e-mail address. so i've back in touch with yet another old friend. i love doing this stuff; things like facebook and my own quests have put me in touch with quite a few people from my past, like jessica, amyH, pritam, etc. i hate the idea that i can lose contact with anyone in my life.

i had dim sum with D at dynasty today. i think weekday dim sum is even better there, because you order off a menu, and they make everything fresh. the turnip cake and leek dumplings were blazing hot, and super-delish. i was so full afterwards, even though we only ordered 5 things. i wanted to go to yogurtland for dessert, but i was too full, and i bailed. we stopped by alexander's afterwards to look at their lunch menu, but they were closed. hm. i swear they used to be open for lunch, and they had stuff like kobe burgers. does anybody know if they don't serve lunch anymore, or if they're just closed on wednesdays?

i hate tv previews that are misleading. that's what happened on last night's _hell's kitchen_. first of all, the "two hours" was lame because the first hour was simply last week's episode. and then, the bit about petrozza yelling and gordon ramsey throwing the plate were all just demonstrations. and finally, the bit about christina crying and stuff wasn't even in the show. LAME. but anyways, i still love the show, and next week, william and D are coming over to my place to watch the finale. i hope it's good!

i ate an apple last night. i hate apple skin. it's thick and tough, and when i chew it, i make a sour face. (it's even worse with grape and plum skin; i can't handle that stuff at all without grimacing like a madman.) but still, all i have left now is a kiwi, and then i'm going to safeway to buy some more fruit. i think i'll get some peaches, pears, and bananas.

do girls really hate being called cute? i got into a huge fight with one of my ex's once because of that. i called her cute, and she just blew up. the fight lasted forever, and i was just stupefied because i personally think cute is such a huge compliment. i would rather date a cute girl than a pretty girl because pretty is just so generic. there are tons of pretty girls out there, but cute (to me) is much rarer and more attractive. *shrug* girls, i want your opinions! (i did read a natalie portman interview once, and she said she hated being called cute because she thought it's reserved for puppy dogs and stuff like that. i guess i can see her point.)

my mom just called me. she's meeting my brother's gf's parents tonight. man, must be awkward. what do you talk about? my parents have never met any of my gf's parents before, so i guess this is a new thing for them. i bet there's a lot of judging and sizing up going on. parents want the best thing for their children, so i can see how they never think the other side is good enough. my mom said that she is doing a lot of praying for my brother and his relationship.

there's techno playing at the office right now, in somebody's cube. i can't believe we used to listen to this stuff. it's so boring and grating! funny how our past can be: musical tastes, fashion, trends, hairstyles, etc. i always wonder how the present will look 10 years in the future. i mean, it's always "normal" for now, but almost all the time, it looks funny when we look back.

endoscopy/colonoscopy, huh? hm. what are they looking for? i'm not sure if i want to ask for it when i get my physical. if it's reserved for older people, i'm afraid my doctor will look at me like i'm nuts when i request one. but yeah, i need to get a physical. i'm just lazy, i guess. my primary physician retired, so he assigned me to some random lady doctor in another branch of PAMF in los altos. ugh. i wonder if i'll be comfortable dropping trou in front of a woman and have her jiggle my testicles. cough!

does anybody out there truly appreciate modern dance? it looks a lot like flopping about to me. i just don't get it. i mean, social dances, i can appreciate because it's a lot of partner skills and teamwork. and stuff like hip hop and even disco, i can see the artistic value in. but contemporary stuff is just something that i don't quite get most of the time, especially when it's one dancer up there wiggling and twirling away. but anyways, tonight's another two hours of _sytycd_. time to ogle the cute girls (chelsieH and courtneyG).

oh! last night, i had a dream where i took a piss. i mean, it was so real that i could actually feel the liquid coming out of my schlong. guys, you know what i'm talking about, right? it's like that vibrating feeling in your johnson as the liquid comes out. then moment i felt that, i woke up, horrified that i might have soiled my sheets. but luckily, it was just a dream, and nothing more. *phew* and i didn't have to go to the bathroom, either. it's the first time that i can remember that actually was in the middle of taking a leak in a dream. so real. wow. i hope i never dream about taking a dump, though, because the consequences of shitting in my bed is just too gross to deal with.

sometimes i wipe so hard that i tear the toilet paper in half. it happened this morning. i get nervous that when the paper tears, i run my fingers into my sphincter and get shit all over my hands. and of course, i have to smell my fingers afterwards. today, i had a slight scent of crap on my wiping (left) hand when it happened, so of course i washed it extra hard after i finished. the worst is when i have to take a dump after i have showered, because when the asshole is moist (no matter how much you've towel-dried it), there's a ton of friction, and the toilet paper just will not move, and you're guaranteed a tear.

so you know how "hidden" parts of the body sweat a lot, right? like armpits, crotches, kneepits. so how come the asscrack part doesn't sweat? at least, i don't think it does.

ok, i gotta pee now. and then it's off to my 6pm smoke, and i gotta do some residual work for the day. ciao!

winded

man, i was beat after basketball today. i played one 3-on-3 game and two 4-on-4 games to 11 (we had a low turnout). that doesn't sound like much, but afterwards, i wanted to pass out. i guess it's because we couldn't play last thursday, so there was a week layoff in between. i really need to play twice a week to get into optimal basketball shape. i missed a lot of shots, too, and even launched a couple of airballs (embarrassing). but at least i got some good exercise, and i hope to improve on thursday.

so tonight's a two-hour show of _hell's kitchen_ and tomorrow is another two hours of _sytycd_. that's a lot of tv. since my mom's not here, i get to watch this stuff live, in glorious HD. i'm especially excited to watch tomorrow's dancing in HD; it'll look awesome, i bet. for the first two weeks, i've been watching the stuff recorded on my VCR, and it's looked like crap.

i'm almost out of fruit. i've got one apple and a kiwi left. we'll see if i'll follow through and buy some myself after i finish those two pieces. i mean, i talk the talk, and it's up to me to walk the walk. the good thing is that we have V8 back at the office, so at least i get some vegetable matter in my system every day.

so as i planned, i'm wearing my beautiful new ecko track jacket today. and i dug out this really old tommy hilfiger boardsports t-shirt with a matching light blue collar. it's so old (around 8 or 9+ years) that the white looks yellow, and threads are coming out all over the place. D made fun of me and told me to donate the t-shirt to the salvation army.

so i've been reading the spec for this new block that i'm supposed to design, and i am planning on starting coding tomorrow. i think it'll be a good thing to do some real codework. there isn't much new code development where i work, so i should count myself luck that i get assigned these new blocks. i hope i don't procrastinate; after the ass kicking that i got from my boss a few weeks ago, i really need to produce.

i find that the depth of my sleep varies. when i first fall asleep, it's pretty deep. i mean, my tv is still on (and tuned to espn), and the volume is pretty loud, yet i sleep through it, to the point where i wake up at 2 or 3am, and the tv is still on. however, in the mornings, the faint sounds of birds chirping or my soft alarm clock radio wakes me up. is that weird? maybe it's because my body has had enough rest, and it *wants* to wake up? hm.

it's time to buy my car new tires. the stock tires (michelin) lasted for only 35K or so miles, and then, i got bridgestone turanza's, which have lasted for 55K so far. i'm getting wear on the inside edges on my two right tires, and it looks pretty bad, so i think i need new tires pretty soon. i might be the driver to jo-ann and ricky's wedding reception in sacramento this weekend, so i hope my tires make it there and back intact. i just had my 90K mile checkup yesterday, so it's going to be an expensive month as far as car care goes.

i'm glad that i've been able to let go of _the moment of truth_. that show was way too sleazy. and addictive. but i've gotten over of the addiction, and i'm happy now. i would never be able to go on that show and leave without hurting lots of people. i have way too many skeletons in my closet. i wonder how they come up with all those pointed questions; they must conduct a really extensive interview and background check or something.

my stocks are taking a serious beating. so far, just within the last few weeks, i've lost over $10K in my portfolio. (and my portfolio isn't that big to begin with.) ugh. it sucks to log on every morning and see red all over the place. i mean, i guess you could say it's time to buy, but who knows if this is the bottom?

how many people out there have satellite radio? i think it's a cool thing; i had it in my rental car when my car was in the body shop. however, i didn't think it would catch on because i thought nobody would ever pay for radio. i own stocks in both sirius and XM, and they are two of my stocks that have fallen a ton. i'm thinking about letting them go.

do any of you women out there own the g-spot vibrator? it looks like the letter 'j', as the g-spot it supposed to be on the front wall of the vagina. has it worked for you? i think the g-spot orgasm is a magical, wonderful thing, having witnessed it firsthand. my wish for every woman out there is to be able to achieve it. if only men had something like that in addition to their regular orgasms.

my mom recommended me get a physical asap, including requesting some procedure that involved sticking some camera up my ass. what is that? is that really necessary for someone my age? it sounds painful, and i'd rather not have to go through that. she mentioned that i can opt for some anesthesia, but i was too horrified to say anything in response or inquire further.

which is sexier? a girl who rides a motorcycle? or a girl who drives stick? i think both are sort of turn-ons, although the former is overriden by the fact that i think motorcycles are really dangerous. and i think the stick thing has sort of a phallic quality to it, like you are actually imagining her manipulating or caressing your stiff schlong or something. but i have been turned on by both.

ok, time to go get some food. i've only had breakfast today.

cool phase (ecko time!)

man, the weather has totally cooled down, to the point where i think it's too cold. ah, i'm hard to please, no? :) but anyways, it's ok, because that just means that i get to wear the beautiful track jacket that i bought on saturday. my coworker D told me that ecko is too young for me, but then, i fired back that hollister is too young for *him*. hehe. isn't hollister the teenager line for abercrombie and fitch?

so here's what i didn't want to talk about last week about why i felt so much tension with my mom. basically, wednesday night, after i came home from dinner, i noticed that the internet was down. so i went upstairs to fix the router, and i noticed that my tv stand was immaculately clean and dusted. and then, to my realization and horror, i remembered that there was this really old porn that i forgot about (i mean, it was like 6 years old) in one of the cubbyholes. !! AUGH! i am 99% sure that my mom saw it, so i basically FREAKED out.

so ever since then, up until my mom left, i had been waiting for her to bring it up. she never did, but every time we were alone together in a private place, i was tense, wondering if she was going to approach the topic. so after she came back wednesday night, i stormed out of the place, unable to handle the pressure. i called up a few friends outside my house, and then, i just stood outside in the street, unable to go back in. finally, i called up paul, and i begged him to go over to his house to decompress. yeah, it was bad.

luckily, the topic never came up, but i wonder how many relatives (including my dad) my mom has told. she's non-confrontational like that.

one thing i noticed while having my mom live with me was how fast the toilet paper was used up. she was just here for a week, and during that time, she used up two entire maxi-rolls of my quilted northern ultra! wow! that's amazing. and she's post-menopause, too, so it wasn't because she was surfing the crimson wave or anything.

you know, with the advent of digitally-linked cameras on highways and everything, one thing you don't notice these days is traffic helicopters. i never hear the whirr of those things anymore. just an observation.

i am itching to do something tonight. i wanted to have dinner with grace and john, but i think they're busy. john's been MIA this entire weekend, and i wonder what the hell's been up to. maybe i'll call up some people for that 25% off the entire bill deal at pizza chicago. oh, and btw, i checked, and i *don't* get july 3rd off. i guess that was just wishful thinking.

somehow, i injured my right shoulder this weekend. i can't raise my right arm, which is alarming because i think it'll affect my basketball playing tomorrow. i'm not sure how this happened. maybe i slept on it funny last night. i had to get up at 8:30am this morning to take my car into the shop for her (yes, my car is a female; her name is "kendra") 90K service. it was hard getting up.

i am really pissed off at this dude at my company. i was taking a leak next to him, and when he finished, he just walked away without flushing. i mean, how utterly rude and disgusting is that? i wanted to say something, but i didn't want to get beat up or anything. but still... what kind of a person doesn't flush? i know it's probably something like "oh, he doesn't want to get his hands dirty on the lever with all the germs" and what not, but damn, that's what washing your hands are for. fucking bastard. i had a frown on my face for like 5 minutes afterwards.

i have not had any gatorade today at the office. i am heeding my mom's advice and been drinking water instead. (i have also had orange juice, dr pepper, and v8. yes, v8 is back. yay!) i am also going to buy some fruit later on this week once i finish what's left at my place. see? i *do* listen to my mom!

i mentioned earlier last week that i have this nasty cut in my left nostril. i've been picking at the scab constantly, so i don't know if the cut will ever heal. what is it with me and picking scabs, huh? i just can't seem to leave anything alone. damn, i swear, if i were a girl, i'd be playing with my breasts and fingering my vadge/clitoris all day long. and along those lines, i spent the better part of saturday afternoon naked because it was so damn hot. yes, i watched my 3 hours of _sytycd_ in the buff. however, even without clothes, it was so hot that even that wasn't totally comfortable. luckily, my couch isn't leather, because my naked ass would have stuck like glue to it.

sigh. no more sports to watch. i always dread the end of NBA season because after that, it's only baseball from here on out. at least, there's the olympics in august, a small oasis in baseball hell. i'm thinking of taking a few days off in august just to stay home and watch the olympics; during the last one, when it was in athens 2004, i was on my italy/spain trip, and there was one day when i ditched my travel mates and stayed in the hotel and watched the games. i am especially interested in basketball (go team USA!) and swimming (go michael phelps!).

ok. i gotta go soon. i need to go pick up car from the dealership.

meals with nelson

so friday night, i took my mom out to A&J. she said it was a famous chain, with locations in taiwan and china. i never thought the food was that special there, but i obliged, and got the beef/tendon noodle soup. this time, i paid, since she had paid for all the previous meals during the week. after dinner, i met up with some bowling folk for pearl drinks at tap ex.

during the weekend, nelson was present during all of my meals. saturday, i dropped off my mom at san jose airport. i got there two hours early, expecting a heavy saturday noonish crowd, but security was really light. i stood with her in line, and then she shooed me away. i left, but secret watched her disappear from afar. as much as she stressed me out during the week, i was sad to see her go.

then, i met up with nelson at the downtown sunnyvale farmer's market, and we had lunch at the vietnamese place on murphy street. it was damn hot out there, so i welcomed eating inside in a nicely air conditioned place. then, we went shopping at macy's. at first, we went looking for boring stuff (socks), but then, we wandered over to the clothing section. i spied this beautiful light blue ecko track jacket (yes, i already have two puma track jackets), and i knew i had to have it. so of course i bought it. ah, whimsical purchases. i can't wait to wear it.

then, i went home and caught up in 3 hours of last week's _sytycd_. will and jessica's hip hop routine was the best. and courtney galiano is hot. but otherwise, the show was unremarkable, and i found it to be very long and grueling, watching the whole thing. then, i watched the ending of _legally blonde_ and _the last samurai_ on cable.

i had dinner with nelson at st. john's (half off burgers). i was tempted to get the spicy "beg for mercy" burger, but opted out of it and got a mushroom burger instead. and of course, i got my whiskey, while nelson had a beer. then, afterwards, nelson and i watched _the incredible hulk_, which surprised me because he's really picky about what movies he chooses to watch at the theaters.

the movie was entertaining, and way better than ang lee's version a few years ago. i thought the opening locale (some city in brazil) was amazing, this metropolis of stacked houses that went on forever. the cameos by the original hulk (lou ferrigno) and stark (ironman) were cool, too. and i saw the preview to the star wars _the clone wars_ upcoming animated feature for the first time, and i'm highly anticipating that. i *heart* star wars.

sunday, five of us had dim sum at dynasty. i hadn't had dim sum in like a month, so i had to organize it. i got there first, and the moment i sat down, a cart with my two favorite things (turnip cake and leek dumplings) came. it was fate, i tell you. i was so happy. after dim sum, we went to yogurtland, and i got my mochi fix. i got pineapple, mango, and tart yogurt.

i went home, took a nap, and watched some tv before heading out to dinner (six of us at southland). this time, instead of ordering our own stuff, we got food family style, and it was surprisingly satisfying. maybe we should do that from now on. we hit ten ren afterwards, and then i went home.

overall, a good weekend of eating, but i really need to find stuff to do in the afternoons. nelson and i were supposed to go to the city to meet up with geoff late sunday afternoon, but that fell through. oh well, maybe next time. and luckily, the weather cooled down significantly on sunday.

panda power

last night, after i had dinner with my mom (at southland), D and i saw _kung fu panda_. i enjoyed it. we saw a semi-late (9:10pm) showing, so luckily there weren't tons of screaming kids in the theater. my favorite part was the dumpling battle. i liked how the turtle was called "oogway," which is the direct chinese translation for "turtle."

so tonight's the last night with my mom. i've been doing stuff with my friends these past few nights to avoid the chance of my mom preaching too much to me, but i think i'm going to suck it up and not do that tonight and see where it goes. after all, it's my last chance to hang out with her. honestly, i'm very apprehensive about it (for reasons which i'll talk about next week when she's gone, and i've talked to a select few about it already), but i'll keep my fingers crossed.

living with my mom one-on-one has been tough, so say the least. i think i need my dad or brother to be around to be a buffer between us. hey, i love my mom to death, but when it's just me and her, so focuses on me 100%, and it gets a little intense. my diet, my living habits, my heathen-ness, everything falls under her gaze, and i get lectured a lot. and of course, there's the religion thing and the preaching. i've learned to tune it out, but still, i could do without it. i find that i tic more when she starts talking about the subject.

however, i *have* picked up a few good habits while she's been here. the main thing is eating fruits. like i said before, i'm going to start consuming them, and i will try my hardest to incorporate them into my regular diet. and drinking water is another thing that i'm going to try to do. i drink gatorade at work as my main form of liquid intake, but i did some research on the internet, and it seems like gatorade's electrolytes are unnecessary when i'm not working out (i'll still drink it when i play basketball), and the sugars in the drink are not good for me.

man, the people on the internet are fast. my mom's flight is at 1:10pm tomorrow, and i got on southwest.com at exactly that time to check in for my mom 24 hours ahead, and i got the boarding pass number A27. that means that 26 people got there before me, right? damn.

2, 2, 2, 1, 11, 22, 56, 4, 1, 59. flower bloom numbers for the plant outside my place. but guess what? this wednesday, they shaved the entire plant down to a nubbin. shit! i have no clue why they decided to do that. there was nothing wrong with it, and i will miss that plant. although, i will say that i won't miss my obsessive compulsion to count the number of flowers that have bloomed. this year, the 56 and 59 were a pain in the ass (and yes, a waste of time) to count every time i went outside for a smoking break.

i've got this nasty cut inside my left nostril. it makes for bloody booger chunks. and a lot of pain, which is exacerbated because i can't leave my nose alone and wind up picking it a lot. how do people get cuts inside their nostrils? hm. maybe it's because it's been so hot lately, and my nose just cracked in the dry air. (it's been in the mid to upper 90's where i live.) i hate this weather; i just have to survive until sunday, when the temperatures will drop into the 70's.

i had boo-boo yesterday. i was opening up a container of altoids while driving, and then i braked really hard. the tin of altoids flew off my lap and onto the floor, spilling the mints all over the place. sigh. how stupid of me. and what a waste of good mints.

i wonder how much my parents have let go of me. i mean, both of them know i smoke, and they don't say anything. you already know that my dad goes on smoking breaks with me. in fact, he even asks me when our next break is sometimes. my mom knows, too (but not about my dad), but i think she only reason why she's ok with it is because she thinks it's for medicinal purposes. (smoking calms my tourette's down.)

i remember the first time my mom caught me smoking. it was during summer after my junior year, when i came back from japan. i picked up my smoking habit from my 6-month stint in japan, and i snuck out of the house for a puffing break. my mom was waiting for me inside when i snuck back in, and she instantly smelled the smoke. she was very visibly upset.

however, after i graduated college, my parents seemed to let go of me. my mom caught me smoking on the balcony when i went to taiwan two years ago, and she expressed displeasure, but she never once told me i should quit. i was very shocked by her acceptance of it. so in a way, i think they consider that i'm an adult now, and i can do whatever i want. i do know, however, that my mom still holds strong opinions on stuff that she considers wrong, like my bad diet and lifestyle practices. it's just whether or not she says anything about it.

so now, i wonder how they'll treat my brother, now that he's graduated. (well, technically, he's 7 weeks away from truly graduating, since he still has one more class to take.) it'll be interesting to see whether they're consistent with him.

if i ever become a parent, i hope i'll be a good one. stuff like teaching kids about sex, relationships, vices, values, etc. it's very weighty stuff, and there are good ways and bad ways to do it. i've got some ideas now, but they're very raw. hopefully i'll have it figured out by the time i need to do it.

half an hour ago, i just had a fluffy cottonball-like dump. seriously, it looked like pet dander or a bunch of dust bunnies. curious!

i was really disappointed to see that _get smart_ got bad overall reviews. (although ebert gave it 3.5/4 stars.) i really want to see my first anne hathaway movie. she's got great eyebrows. i found some naked pics of her on google, and her boobs are really far apart. that's not so good. i still think she's got a beautiful face, though.

ok, 6pm. cig time. have a STUPENDOUS weekend folks!

lost without internet

sorry guys for not posting yesterday. the internet was down in my office the entire day. apparently, the router at our company's ISP was broken. the only internet i had was AIM during part of the afternoon (which i found was odd; yahoo! messenger didn't work). man, i felt so lost. i started wandering the halls aimlessly when i had nothing to do. it was like that _south park_ episode. it's amazing how much internet i use during the day. i dearly missed facebook, espn, and e-mail (in reverse order). at least, i got to chat with some friends during the pm.

ever since my mom's been here, my fruit intake has gone up infinite-fold. we've gone to safeway almost every night, and i've had peaches, pears, bananas, and kiwi's. it's good for my system. i know my diet is shit, and after my mom leaves, i promise myself that i'll have fruit every once in a while, if not daily. i realized that it's not so hard to eat that stuff and incorporate it into my diet; it's vegetables that are tougher, because you usually have to cook it. but fruits? just wash, eat, and throw away. easy breezy. thanks mom!

i can't wait for 4th of july weekend. in addition to the actual holiday on friday, we get thursday off as well. hm. i wonder what i'm going to do on that thursday. i don't think any of my friends have that day off, so i need to figure out what to do. maybe i'll call up grace (who's contracting from home) and see if i can hang out with her that day.

greg sent out an evite for a july 5th BBQ. ann added two guests, her dogs muffin and buttercup. she shortened their names to "muff" and "butt" and wrote them on her evite response. i laughed, because "muff and butt" sounds like a porn video name. i don't think she knows what a muff is. i wonder if i'll get a chance to explain to her what it means.

next weekend, dishi, barden and i are heading up to sacramento go jo-ann and ricky's wedding reception. i'm excited to see the two of them, especially jo-ann. time to bust out another red envelope! i think i'll finally have a chance to wear one of my new wonderful club monaco shirts. those of you who read my old geocities journal know that i was in love with jo-ann back in 2000. we even went to portland together once, but alas, it was not to be. but i know ricky, and he's a good guy, so i'm happy for the two of them. sincerely! :)

my old church friend jeffrey is coming out here for a year starting in late june. i called him up last night, and i talked to his new wife nicki for a while. she is an apparent foodie, and we talked about all the places we want to hit up for fancy dinners. on our list: chez panisse, gary danko, and french laundry. i've never been to any of those. but truth be told, my palate isn't very refined, so i don't know if i can appreciate any of those places. i've only had two prie fixe tasting menu dinners (masa's and charles nob hill), and i can't say that either of them were smashing, except for that bone marrow at masa's. i think any dinner over $100 per person is probably a waste.

my mom's telling me to get rid of my pillow cases and blanket. i mean, she's probably right, because i've had them since high school and all throughout college and beyond. but they're sooo comfortable and cool! i don't want to let them go. *sniff*

do your moms rummage through the house and clean incessantly when they come over? i mean, i come home at night, and all my stuff is in a different place, and things just seem cleaner and different. it's not necessarily a bad thing, but i wonder if all moms are clean freaks. there was this one study done about how women loved the game tetris because it had to do with imposing order and cleanliness to random blocks.

i've started wearing collared polo's to work on non-basketball days. i figured i should dress better. i heard this thing on the radio the other day about how people who dress crappily don't get promotions and raises as often. but i haven't graduated to buttondowns, though. and i don't tuck my shirts in. so maybe i'm just doing this half-assed.

i'm really gassy today. we had indian buffet today, and i must have farted like 5 times this afternoon. it's not stinky, as far as i can tell, but very bubbly. i don't fart much these days, as i expel most of my gas when i take my liquid dumps. so today, i was afraid that my sphincter was confused whether the stuff coming out was gas or liquid. i stood there, carefully judging what my anal computer had to say, and i decided that it was safe to let it out. luckily, it was correct in determining that it was gas and not other states of matter.

it just occured to me the other day that nadia, diana, and aidan are all anagrams of each other.

i am having serious frozen yogurt/mochi withdrawal.

do any of you get ingrown nipple hair? i pluck mine, so sometimes the pores close, and the hair grows back and bulge against the surface. it itches, and i have to scratch violently against the skin with my tweezers or fingernails to pop the follicle out. it's all just great fun.

ok. 6pm smoke time.

enchanted

i am in love. in love with this dance routine. (watch it in high resolution.) yup, last night, after taking my mom out to dinner, i plopped myself down and watched 3 hours (minus commercials) of last week's _sytycd_ top 20. this routine by katee and joshua just blew me away. since then, i've watched it about 7 times. the backstory is that it's about a soldier leaving for iraq. i have to say, i didn't think much before of the jordin sparks/chris brown song, but now i like it. and the choreography, the emotion, the execution... it was all just perfect and fucking beautiful. *total bliss*

so my dad was able to get on an earlier flight up here from LA, and it was nice seeing him. one of the first things he asked of me was to pour him some whiskey, although i didn't have any with him. and then, we shared a smoke outside. i'm glad that my dad is ok with me drinking and smoking, and the fact that he does those things with me. i don't know what my mom thinks of that, though; in fact, my dad ashes his cigarettes whenever my mom shows up. unfortunately, my dad left this morning without saying goodbye. i heard him packing the car outside through my bedroom window, but by the time i got dressed and went downstairs, he had driven away. *sniff*

so this is a picture of my family, taken approximately 16 years ago. i look really different, huh? i gained a ton of weight (like 30 pounds) when i turned 25, and my metabolism dropped off a cliff. my brother's so cute! when i picture my brother, this is about the age (maybe a little bit older) that i remember him as. this photo was snapped about when i left for college, so that was when i stopped having prolonged exposure to my little bro, so time just sort of freeze-framed after that. what's weird, though, is that i don't know why i'm not wearing glasses in this picture. and my dad's hair has grayed a lot since then. (so has my mom's, but she dyes her hair every few weeks.) my brother and i have big ears. you should us when we pull them out. we look like fievel.

now, this is a picture of my family, taken a few days ago outside hop woo restaurant, where i took my dad out for father's day. my dad, brother and i are all actually the same height, but i think i'm slouching. my, how time passes, and we get older. it's rare that all four of us are in a picture together, so i thought i'd share this photo. i should gel my hair up so it doesn't look nasty, but you know that 3-1-1 rule at the airport, and i didn't check in any bags. my brother looks a lot different too, huh? he weighs a solid 20 pounds (at 190) heavier than me, and he eats like a horse, sort of like me when i was his age. i am afraid of what he will look like when he hits that magical age of 25; he might just get really really fat.

i had a ridiculously scary dream this morning. basically, i was a prisoner, and R (a guy i play basketball with), was a torturer. at one point, they decided i was next to torture, and they said, "take off his leg!" i was freaking out, and R took out a gun and shot my foot. my left big toe's nail exploded off. !! i have never been shot before, so it didn't hurt; it just had this vibrating stunning feeling, and i was jolted awake, shivering. it was such a horrible dream.

how do you extract a member of a cult who's happy where he is? how do you tell him he's in a cult without hitting a huge brick wall of denial?

damn, i am hungry right now. after i woke up, my mom fed me a peach and a kiwi. by the time i left home, it was too late for my usual tues/thurs mcdonald's breakfast. and after basketball (i don't want to talk about it; i had a horrible outing today), i was too lazy to get myself lunch. so i think i'm going to leave early and grab some food with my mom.

my mom's a believer that all western medications are "poison," so she's asking me to take these fish oil pellets and brown rice extract pills to fight my tourette's. i am highly skeptical. i guess i'll try it to appease her, but i don't have a solid frame of reference because i'm still taking my doctor's meds as well, and i am deathly afraid of going off of them. the two things that my mom preaches to me are religion and health. the latter one is ok and probably good for me, but they involve such a drastic change in my lifestyle that i find it hard to adopt.

i miss frozen yogurt. i didn't get a chance to go to pinkberry while i was down in LA. i could have gone with my cousins, but they weren't around while i was there. sigh. i think of all the yogurt chains i've tried, pinkberry is my favorite.

my dump schedule is back to normal now. amazing what being home does for you; i swear my bowels must have this "home sensor" lodged within its depths that knows when to be regular and when to be all wonky and stuff.

ok, not much left to do here at work. going home soon.

lunch at stanford

for lunch today, i drove to stanford campus to meet up with dave, his cutie toddler son dylan, and jose. ah, good old college buddies. it was nice seeing them (i saw them last night, too). man, life sure changes when you have kids. watching dave take care of his kid really made me wonder when i'll ever be mature enough to have kids of my own. i don't think i'll ever hit that maturity level the way i'm going. last night, he was talking about his sleep pattern for the first year or so, and even now, dylan gets up around 5-6am. holy crap! i mean, i get up at 10am at the earliest! ...

dave is an assistant professor at USC, so he's bought some USC gear for dylan. we've been giving him crap about that, since both he and his wife carolyn were stanford grads with us. so today, i hope he's remedied that by buying his kid some stanford jersies and t-shirts. go cardinal! i recommended the track house for a nice football jersey. dave justifies the USC stuff by saying that the school pays the bills, but still, it's your alma mater that counts, right?

lately, whenever i'm in a crowd, i find myself thinking horrible thoughts just to see if there are any people around me with telepathic capabilities. these thoughts are stuff like, "you're a big ugly bitch" or "i hope you die." isn't that horrible? so far, no one's reacted by smacking me in the fact, so i think telepathy is a crock of bullshit, haha. or maybe i've just met some very kind ESP'ers. :)

man, it's monday. i have a full week of work ahead of me. even though i had four days off of work, i don't feel rested. being with my family isn't relaxing, to say the least. i feel like i was on my toes for the entire time. my parents bicker a lot, and that is never fun to be around. they don't seriously fight; it's just the way they interact with each other. and meeting my brother's girlfriend was a bit stressful, too. i wonder if that's how it was when i introduced my gf to my parents when i graduated 12 years ago. funny, my brother takes after me; we both introduced korean girls to our parents for the first time when we graduated. i wasn't nervous or anything, probably because i was so wrapped up in my own excitement and stuff. but this time, being an outsider, i could definitely feel the tension.

i think i take after my dad. both of us speak our minds. it's kind of amusing to watch from a third person's point of view. and sometimes i think it's not that good of a trait, because sometimes what we say can be quite controversial. so now i'm wondering if it's something i should tone down. *ponder*

whenever i travel, for some insane reason, it messes up my GI system. i know i only took a 1-hour flight to LA, for during my stay there, i no longer had that instant urge to take a shit in the morning during my morning cigarette. it was really weird. i mean, my morning routine was all messed up. maybe my body knows that it's in a foreign land (i guess soCal is foreign to me? damn, it's only 400 miles away), so it gets confused as to what to do. i literally had to force out my morning dumps, sometimes as much as an hour after i got out of bed. thank goodness, though, that i had a tv in the bedroom i was sleeping in, so at least i still had ESPN at night.

while talking to one of my brother's church friends after his reception, i remembered one big reason why i used to fight with church's policies back when i was in it. it had to do with their segregation of guys and girls. this particular church is really strict about separating young males and females, like not letting them date or interact with each other. that really makes me mad. i mean, dealing with the opposite sex (i.e. relationships, dating, sex, etc.) is one of the most basic components of life itself, and instead of shielding this aspect of living from the kids, the church should embrace it and guide the young ones instead of not letting them experience it at all. i was very sore about this subject for a long time back then, and after my discussion with this guy, i was reminded of it again. hrmph. i feel the same way about standard "vices" such as drinking and partying. i'd rather let people experience it and learn their own boundaries and limits.

hehe. i remember the only advice my dad gave me when i left for college: "do NOT drink." and then, like my second or third night during orientation, i got hammered. ah, that upside-down margarita that this girl named "una" gave me. i will never forget it. sure, i went overboard a few times, i woke up drunk once, i had an alcohol-fueled one-night stand, but i learned on my own how to handle alcohol, and now i'm fine. that's the way to do it, i think. you can't teach this stuff by not letting kids touch alcohol at all.

ok, i'll step off my soapbox now. but man, that church thing about segregating sexes really pisses me off.

i think anne hathaway is really pretty. i did a google image search on her, and i was very surprised that she's already done a nude scene (nice nipples, by the way, very munchable). she seems so wholesome! i mean, i don't think she's gone nuts partying a la lindsay lohan style, so i respect her for that. (if she has, then i plead ignorance.) but anyways, i like her, and i will probably try to see _get smart_ because of her. fyi, i have never seen any of her movies.

anybody want to watch _kung fu panda_ with me this weekend? did i mention i saw _zohan_ and liked it? that girl (love interest) is really cute, too. IMDb states that she was in a few episodes of _the OC_, but i didn't recognize her.

ok, that's it. gonna check up on a few things before i leave work. gonna take my mom out to dinner and then catch up on 3 hours of last week's _sytycd_.

saturday/sunday

so on saturday, lunch with my brother and his gf was a little stressful. it was the first time my parents and i were meeting her, btw, so i was on edge. my brother, his gf, and my mom are very religious, and at one point, the exchange went as follows:

dad: health is number one (in priority).
mom: no! the lord is number one.
dad: well, i am talking about the *real* world.
mom: no! *i* am talking about the real world!

ugh. my mom and dad bicker a lot like that, about everything. i just didn't know what to do, so i started staring off into space, hoping the moment would end. anyways, the gf seems like a nice girl.

later on in the afternoon, the gf's parents and my parents met over tea or something. i figured that this could be a train wreck, so i declined to go. instead, i took a nap. (this entry overlaps my previous weekend entry.)

then, at night, we drove to the LA meeting hall for my brother's church's graduation reception. man, that was really weird. it was like being in church again. (background info: i attended church for one year, during my senior year in high school.) there were hymns sung, biblical passages read, and testimonies spoken. and the word "amen" was uttered by the masses like two hundred times, i'm not kidding you. it was like being in another world. i was very uncomfortable, and i'm sure my dad was in the same place. i caught him napping, even.

there was a little sermon about values changing, i.e. value in christ vs. value in the material world, and there were also testimonies given by all the graduating seniors. my brother's speech was pretty good. i know that he and i don't share the faith in god, but i'm proud of him and who he is and what he believes in.

i was a little apprehensive in going to this event because i knew that G was going to be there. G is this girl that i met when i went to church way back when in 1991-92. she was the main reason why i went, because i thought she was cute. in fact, she was the first girl i ever said "i love you" to, albeit it was in a written letter. however, when i went off to college, i promptly forgot about her (when i met k1), and i dropped her off the face of the planet, so i figured i hurt her pretty badly.

so when i first saw her, i think we made eye contact, and i immediately retreated. after the reception was over, i just gathered myself together, walked over, tapped her on the shoulder, and said hi. i knew she was pregnant, (in fact, she's due in two weeks) so i congratulated her on her impending delivery, and she smiled and said thanks and introduced me to her husband, who's a pretty good-looking and friendly guy. we didn't talk much afterwards. but i'm glad she's doing well. *phew*

sunday, i took my dad out to lunch for father's day. we were joined by my brother (who recommended the restaurant) and one of his church buddies jason. i sneaked out and gave my credit card to one of the waiters, but then, after the meal, my dad announced that he was going to pay. i fought him long and hard, telling him that i had already given my credit card. eventually, my dad relented, and i won.

right after lunch, my dad dropped my mom and me off at the airport off two hours early (i didn't want to miss my flight again), but this time, security was a 5-minute breeze. shit. so we waited a long-ass time, and i was bored out of my mind. the flight was uneventful, but then came the porn-hiding. (sorry, the story to come isn't that interesting.)

basically, when i drove home, i dropped my mom at the doorstep with her luggage, and i went through the garage. then, i closed the garage door, ran inside to the dvd player with my bag, stuffed the porn in my bag, and then opened the front door to let my mom in. it was that simple. *phew* no porn discovery for my mom! yay! yes, i had been planning this for days.

i picked up some food for my mom on the drive back, and then i went over to jack and amy's place in union city for dinner. dave, carolyn, their kid dylan, and then jose came over, and it was a nice little college reunion. it was actually a nice break away from the family stress (it's never relaxing when i'm with the family) to end the weekend. amy cooked up a feast, and i thank her for that. it was fun watching the kids play, and i played a game of war with little boy anthony, although i'm pretty sure he cheated and gave himself all the face cards. :)

so that was it for my 4-day weekend. the undisclosed family drama is still there, and i'm not sure how it's going to resolve itself. i understand it a little better now, and i'm going to do a little more investigating on my own, i think. i just hope i can get through this week with my mom staying wtih me. she's already preached god to me a few times. :/

graduation weekend

well, my trip to LA started off horrendously. i thought that travel on thursday would be light, so i gave myself 50 minutes at the airport. bad decision. security took 45 minutes, and the line was out to the parking lot. when i was about 20 feet from the beginning of security, i saw that my flight was already boarding. i was like, "shit!"

after i got through security, i ran as fast as i could to gate A10, so fast that i pulled my left ass/upper hamstring muscle. and when i got there, i saw that the plane had already left. it was the first time ever that i missed my flight. *sobs* so i waited an hour and a half for the next flight out to LA.

so my parents picked me up, and we went to a few places to find a jacket for my mom. unfortunately, we weren't able to find one, so my mom just bought a long sleeved shirt. then, we rested for a while, and we went to PV palace in lomita for my aunt's 60th birthday/brother's graduation celebration dinner.

the cool thing was that our private room had a flat screen television mounted on the wall, so we watched the entire celtics/lakers game 4 during dinner. the game was amazing (for us celtic fans, anyway), and after dinner, while the game was still on, the three women went outside to talk, and the rest of us guys watched the rest of game. even the cooks and waiters watched from the doorway. man, this town is crazy for its lakers.

on friday, we had lunch at a chinese restaurant, and then i went home and watched the france/netherlands euro 2008 game. france lost terribly, 1-4, and i texted my boss asking if he had just watched it. he replied, "no comment." poor guy (he's french).

then, it was off to my brother's UCLA graduation. we picked him up at his house, and then we went to pauley pavilion an hour early. the place filled up completely. luckily, my brother was able to secure a third ticket, so all of us could go.

so, former president bill clinton was going to be the keynote speaker, but apparently, he backed out because of a strike going on at UCLA. i really wanted to hear him speak, so it was a big bummer to everybody, as the boos rained down at the venue when the news was mentioned. the actual speaker was this student who just made something up for 3 minutes, so it was really lame. but at least it kept the ceremony short.

for dinner, we went to chabuway in westwood, this japanese ramen place. my dish was really bad; i ordered this shrimp ibushi thing that was supposed to be spicy but turned out to be dry and gross.

on the way out, my parents dropped me off at my college buddy alex's house, and it was great seeing him. he fed me alcohol (i had three whiskey's), and we smoked his hookah (apple tobacco) and just chatted for like two hours. it was awesome. he dropped me off at midnight, and i was very happy.

today, we had lunch with my brother and his girlfriend. it was the first time my parents and i met her, so i hope she didn't feel like she was facing the inquisition. she seems nice. i just woke up from a nap, and i think i'm going to watch the u.s. open for a while before dinner. and tonight, my brother's church group is having a graduation reception.

so we decided that my mom is flying back with me tomorrow and staying home with me for a week. when we spoke of it, my dad saw that my face became very sour or concerned. it's not that i don't want my mom to stay with me, but it's just that i have a box of porn on my dvd player that i need to get rid of secret when we get home. hm. i need a strategy.

ok, so that's the update for now. hope you're having a good weekend!

swift kick

well, i got a kick in the ass today. my boss called a meeting at 10am today asking me my progress on debugging those 91 failing tests. i told him each of the roadblocks i had during the progress, and he was not pleased. basically, he said that three weeks was a ridiculous amount of time to do this, and that i should have gotten this done a lot sooner. "unacceptable" was a word that he used twice. he said that if i don't get this done by the end of next week, the design that i am supposed to work on next will be given to someone else. basically, i felt humiliated and very small after the meeting.

so, after the meeting, i worked like a maniac today. i actually got through 5 tests before lunch, which is quite amazing, if you ask me. and this afternoon, i actually asked for help (which is a rare feat) and debugged two more. so now, i have 4 left to do. i told my boss about my progress, and he told me that i needed that kick in the ass. i think i agree with him. i guess it's called tough love.

anyways, it's almost 7pm, and i'm going to grab dinner here at the office, work a bit more, and then i'm seeing _zohan_ with D at 8:10. i'm also taping _sytycd_'s 2 hour show tonight, but i don't know if i'm going to be able to watch it tonight. i have to pack, buy cigarettes, get gas, get money, and prep for my trip to LA tomorrow. i'm definitely looking forward to this break from work. we'll see if today's stress translates to more ticcing in a few days; stress has a way of catching up with me.

i really want to visit pinkberry while i'm down in socal, but i don't think anybody will want to go with me. the closest one (i think) is in long beach, and that's quite a ways away. oh well. it'll save me $6.

i've been using this "gentle exfoliating" dove soap for a few weeks now. these soap bars have tiny little spheres embedded in them that serve as abrasives, taking off dead skin when you rub them against yourself. at first, i thought it was neat, because it gave the sensation of scratching myself when i lathered up. however, it's just plain annoying now. i don't know what to do with the remaining four bars. does anybody local want them? i'm sure it's probably good for my skin, but i can't stand the feeling now.

ok, i just finished eating the company dinner. the theme was indian food, so i got some saucey chicken and two samosas. the samosas weren't bad, considering they were cooked by greek people. but now i'm stuffed. i need a cigarette. i'll probably have one on the drive to the movie theater.

no, i don't use gel in my hair (only for special occasions). so the flakes coming out of my hair is definitely scalp flakes. it's so weird.

ok, i really gotta go. i might blog from LA, but that's only if i find time and a computer. otherwise, have a great rest of the week!

near disaster

boy, i almost pissed in my bed this morning. i had a dream where i was all about to take a leak, but i paused, and then, my friend amyM showed up and told me, "if you don't do it now, you'll have to wait 18 hours." so i thought, "that's a weird statement," and i was an odd enough reaction that it jolted me awake, and then i realized i was dreaming that whole thing. *phew* i was *this* close to wetting my bed!

so i got handed a big assignment at work today. unfortunately, i'm not done with my current assignment, so my boss is scheduling a 10am meeting (ugh) tomorrow to discuss what to do. he is pushing hard to get me started on my next task, and frankly, it looks tough. i'm not looking forward to it. it's a ton of math, which is boring, and it's not much creative design. and verifying it is going to be a nightmare. there will be a lot of rounding and clipping mismatches, i'm sure of it.

i had a quick dinner with alan and ting yesterday. it was nice to see them. they're so busy these days, since they're in the process of packing/moving into a new house and selling their current one. since they have open house on the weekends, they usually go to alan's mom's or sister's house on weekends, so i never get to see them then. their new house is up in redwood city, which is further away than they live now, so i wonder how often we'll get together after they move.

yes, ann, i've tried red mango, on the day they opened. it wasn't anything special. so far, i think i like pinkberry the best, although i only had it twice, and it was 6 months ago. maybe it was the novelty of it, *shrug*. but as far as taste goes, i like sweet corner (yogurt fantasy) second. i've been to fraiche two or three times, and i think they're ok, except they didn't have mochi; i've heard that they have it now. but downtown palo alto is too far for me to go to get yogurt, unless i'm already in the vicinity.

every time i get a haircut and wash my hair afterwards, i wind up getting a ton of dandruff. does this happen to anyone else? i think it might be because i scrub my head really hard to get all the stray hair out, and i wind up over-exfoliating my scalp. anyways, it's really annoying, and just a little gross.

i played very well in my first basketball game today. after missing my first two shots, i made all four of my subsequent jumpers afterwards. that felt really good. however, i must have shot my wad after that, because i played like crap in the next two games. i usually don't play basketball the week before i go out of town (for fear of injury), and today, my left knee and left foot gave me some problems; i had shooting pains in both parts. hm. i'm not sure what's going on here, but i hope it's not anything serious.

speaking of pain, last week, i had one episode when i was taking a leak where it really hurt. i mean, it STUNG like crazy. i think there may have been tiny stones in my piss or something. i had never felt anything like that before, and i just gutted it out. after that, i dreaded peeing the next few times, and i did it extra carefully. (you might ask, "how do you pee carefully?" i did it by controlling my kegel muscle and letting out a slow stream, sometimes a drop at a time.)

one of my friends went to a porn convention. i almost went to one myself, back in 2000 or so. i was at CES in las vegas, and AVN was being held down the street. i was so bored, and i considered taking a cab to AVN. however, i didn't want to get caught, so i didn't end up going. my friend said there wasn't anything that spectacular, though. i'm not sure what i'd get excited about if i went to a porn convention. i don't even think there are that many hot porn stars. i mean, i think kobe tai gives great blowjobs, but i don't think that's particularly attractive. i think lexus has a good face (but nasty fake boobs), and i liked madison back in the early 90's before she (allegedly, i never saw her later movies) got all dominatrix-y.

speaking of porn, i am officially tired and bored of my tekoki videos. no more straight handjobs for me. i'm switching back to my old (normal) stuff.

i'm meeting up with adam, rae and william tonight for dinner, which means i might miss part of _the moment of truth_. good riddance. i'm tired of this show overhyping itself.

ok, gonna head off to dinner soon. one more workday left!

zero calorie surprise

over the weekend, at the paddle for life (dragonboating) event, i tried coke zero. it wasn't bad! it didn't have the nasty aftertaste that diet coke has. i was very impressed. i looked at the ingredients, and the sweetener was aspartame. i don't know how they did it. it's not going to make me drink it from now on (i don't drink coke anyways, since i'm a dr pepper fan), but i was just amazed that they were able to simulate a full-sweetener taste with zero calories. kudos!

i was knocked off my ass and shocked today with some family news from an e-mail i got this morning. i haven't been the same since. it's a little personal, so you can e-mail me if you want to know the scoop. i've already IM'ed some people about it (i mean, it's big stuff) to get it off of my chest, but man, it's a doozy.

if i have time, i'm going to get a haircut today. it's been like six weeks since my last cut. i'm incredibly shaggy in the back, and i need to look good for my brother's graduation pictures. i'm still not sure what the hell is going to happen during his ceremony, since he only got two tickets to the event, and there are three of us (mom, dad and i) going. i volunteered to not go, so maybe i'll try to hook up with some friend during? *shrug*

i saw that _roman holiday_ is playing at the stanford theater in a few weeks. i love the movie to death. audrey hepburn and gregory peck are two of the most beautiful people on this planet, and it's such a gorgeous and wonderful film. i've seen the movie maybe five times, and at least twice in the theaters. if my mom's out here when it's playing, i'll take her out on a date and go watch it. when i visited rome, i was so happy to see the spanish steps where audrey had that ice cream cone. (the entire movie was shot on location in rome.)

i had a dream the other day where two of my female college friends were breastfeeding their babies. i tried hard not to look, but i just couldn't keep from sneaking a peek at their boobs. one of them (C), had her baby tucked underneath her huge t-shirt, but the other one (N) had her breasts out in the open. crazy, i don't know why i get dreams like that. and the other day, i dreamt that i used the bathroom after my friend had taken a nasty dump, and the place reeked of shit. i didn't think that dreams involved the sense of smell, but boy, did this one stink.

our company is switching caterers. i hope the next one is better. i used to eat at the company cafeteria a lot, but when they switched to the greek/mediterranean people, i stopped eating there. you can only eat so much hummus and felafel, you know? ok, it wasn't so bad; they had more variety than i let on, but still, the quality of the food wasn't very good. i still like going out to get food because i like to get away from the office (and having longer lunch breaks), but if the food's good downstairs, i wouldn't mind eating there once in a while.

D and i went to get pho today for lunch. at the next table over, there was a semi-cute girl (with nice cleavage, i might add). however, she was only cute from a 3/4 view. when she turned her head, and i saw her straight on, she didn't look so good. it's weird how that happens, when the angle matters. i think i look really bad from the side view, because my face is very flat, and i have a big nose. and when i smile, my mouth recedes, and my chin juts out. it's not pretty.

just how big is hannah montana/miley cyrus? when we went to target yesterday, the store had an entire display of hannah montana stuff: clocks, mirrors, and other random stuff devoted to the girl. crazy shit. when mikeC and i were waiting for paul and leeya to arrive on saturday, i *tried* to watch her show. it was pretty painful. i mean one of the kids was wearing a fuchsia shirt, for crying out loud! it was like _saved by the bell_, but even more juvenile. but i must admit, i do like that one song of hers.

the company has no gatorade today, so i've resorted to drinking water. i've found that i've been peeing more often than normal. hm. i wonder if the water vs. gatorade thing has anything to do with it.

ok, time to head off and get my haircut.

cheap eats

this weekend, all of my meals were under $10, except for one of them. yay for being frugal! haha.

friday night, i got home late from work, and no one was available, so i just grabbed taco bell ($5) and watched tv. i skype'd my mom and went to bed early, in preparation for the early day to follow.

saturday, i got up at 9am, and i grabbed breakfast at mcd's ($3) and headed over to mikeC's house to wait for paul and leeya. they arrived at 10, and we headed up to jack london square in oakland to watch team "doggie paddlers" in their dragonboat competition. we missed their first race, which they won, and it was a while until their second race, so we grabbed lunch at the home of chicken and waffles ($8). i hadn't had waffled in years, so it was extra tasty. the chicken sausage wasn't so good, though.

team doggie paddlers came in 4th in their second race, and then, it was a couple of hours until their 3rd and final race, so we hung out at the barnes and noble bookstore for a while. i bought a graduation card for my brother. then, i bought a hazelnut latte and broused through a _blender_ magazine in the cafe. the cover article was about tila nguyen (better known as tila tequila). the photos were taken by peter yang, a friend of my friend amy (a la tofubunny.com). i was very impressed. then, we hung out in the shade and listened to the band that was playing outside.

we watched the third race, which was quite exciting. team doggie paddlers came in 2nd, but they lost by only half a second. close! then, we left oakland and headed home. i checked up on the sporting news of the day: ana ivanovic (who i think is really cute) won the french open women's title, and big brown, unfortunately, came in last in the belmont stakes.

then, a group of 8 of us went to dusita for dinner ($14). the food was good, and i got what i wanted: duck skin. yum! after dinner, we went to lowe's for a bit (mikeC had to buy some stuff for his home), and headed back to paul's place and watched _27 dresses_. i thought the movie was cute, but every time i see james marsden, all i can think about is the fact that he's cyclops from the _x-men_ movies.

sunday, paul, mikeC and i went to denny's for brunch/lunch. i got the build-your-own-slam breakfast: two orders of sausage, scrambled eggs, and hash browns ($8). i LOVE scrambled eggs topped with cholula! then, we hit target to buy some stuff (i bought some security envelopes). then, i dropped off the guys and headed home. i watched a bit of _randy jackson present: america's best dance crew_ and then took a nap.

at 5pm, my coworker D came over, and we had an early dinner at ryowa ramen ($9). afterwards, he grabbed tapioca, while i went to sweet corner (the new name of yogurt fantasy) and got froyo. then, we watched the lakers/celtics game. man, the celtics almost blew it. they had a 24-point lead in the 4th quarter and had it trimmed down to a 2 points. ridiculous. talk about getting complacent. but still, they pulled it out in the end, and i was happy.

afterwards, i met up with paul and leeya at tap-ex for pearl tea until closing. man, they're pretty rude about it. they don't announce they're closing; instead, they just turn off the lights and walk away.

anyways, it was a good weekend, and i got sunburnt from being out on saturday. i had a distinct farmer's red glow on my forearms. ugh. i should have anticipated that and put on some sunblock. but yeah, i'm leaving for LA this thursday, so i only have a 3-day workweek! yay!

debugging machine

*phew* i know i'm starting this entry late today; i've been debugging like a maniac during this afternoon. we're supposed to tape out our chip early next week, so i've got a lot of pressure on me to finish resolving my test failures. so far this afternoon, i've finished debugging three tests. it was frustrating, i tell you, but i'm pleased with my progress. i might have to come in to work this weekend. *RAAR*

so i actually enjoyed _SatC_! i thought the ending was forced, though, and i did get bored at one point and looked at my watch. that's the sign of me thinking a movie is too long, if i look at my watch during the movie. i thought the nudity was excellent; damn, one of the girls that dante was having sex with had huge boobs! there wasn't enough sex talk, though; i mean, isn't the title of the movie _*SEX* and the city_? but anyways, i went in with low expectations, and i liked it. that's the way to go: low expectations.

after the movie let out around 10pm, i went home and watched the 2-hour tape of _sytycd_'s vegas week. i was looking out for phillip chbeeb, but he was nowhere to be found. i guess he was probably cut pretty early on. too bad. he is brilliant in his own style, but i bet he can't do choreography very well. but there are two cute dancers in the top 20 this season! yay! there's courtney galiano and chelsie hightower. neither of them are as hot as lauren gottlieb from last year, but they're cute nonetheless.

we had a little popsicle/frozen dessert meeting in our company today, and they had these treats where they hollowed out half of an orange/lemon and filled it with mango or lemon sorbet. it was good. i was surprised at the labor it took to do this on a mass market scale. i mean, somebody had to cut the fruit, scrape out all the insides, and fill in the rest with the sorbet. do you think that there's a machine that can do all that? probably, huh? anyways, i was impressed. i wonder if they sell that stuff at safeway; i'd buy it.

i am proud of my young coworker D. at the end of the meeting, they announced awards for outstanding performers in the division. D got one! i know that he's been working hard, because there was a stretch where he was working until midnight every night. the award was a $150 gift certificate for dinner anywhere (basically, you have a nice dinner, and the company reimburses you). i teased him about going to alexander's. but anyways, i definitely think he deserved it.

oh, back to the movie. as expected, there were very few men there. i scanned the audience, and i think i counted maybe 5 men total. one of them was there by himself, poor guy. but there was a group of girls who were talking loudly during the movie, prompting shouts of "shut the fuck up!" from the rest of the audience. it was so fucking annoying. eventually, they left to jeers and quarreling, but i was afraid because i thought they were going to grab some firearms, come back, and shoot us. they were real punks. bitches! man, i don't know what drives people to be so rude. it honestly baffles me.

i really want to see big brown win the kentucky derby. i dunno, i know most people don't give a shit about horse racing, but i'd like to see a triple crown winner in my lifetime. *shrug* i don't think i'll be able to watch the race, though, because i plan on going to the dragonboat racing event tomorrow. we'll see.

i had $10 (pre-tax/tip) worth of sushi at gombei #3 today. it was actually decent. i didn't care for the shrimp tempura roll, but the california roll (i'm pretty sure it was fake crab, though), the spicy tuna roll, and the unagi (wow, they gave me two big slices of unagi) were all decent. and it was all just ten bucks. not bad. i think i'm going to go to this gombei a lot. if only their had their gombei special. *sniff* i love croquette's.

so far, in the nearly four years i've worked here, i haven't smelled anyone's shit in the men's bathroom. that's pretty good. usually, i'd expect at least one person would have a rank #2 outing, you know? i mean, i've stunk up the bathroom before, and i've had friends/gf's who've taken dumps that have reeked, but so far, i haven't caught a whiff of shit in the men's bathroom at the office. i find that pretty impressive. maybe the ventilation system in the john is really good or something.

did you guys notice that in _the lord of the rings_, frodo's fingernails are really short? i mean, painfully, super-chronic-nailbiter short? i wonder why/how they did that. i mean, was that an artistic decision? or is elijah wood a nailbiter? it looks really uncomfortable? i bite my nails, but 99% of the time, i keep at least a sliver of white left. (except today, when, for the first time in ages, i really attacked a nail and took off way more than i normally do.)

it never fails that after a movie, i need to go take a piss, even if i go to the bathroom before. last night, i felt the urge after _SatC_, but i challenged myself to hold it in until i got back home. and when i rushed back to the toilet at my place, surprisingly, both holes opened. yup, i had a double whammy. the current roll of toilet paper ran out, too, but luckily, i had just bought a new 4-pack from safeway the other day. running out of tp is another nightmare of mine. what do you do if you run out? waddle out of the bathroom and grab a kleenex or paper towel?

ok. 7:10. time to wrap this baby up. have a good weekend folks! maybe i'll see you on the weekend. (i hope not.)

acceptable work clothes

so we had a company meeting today, and one of the guys who sat behind me was wearing a t-shirt that said (in all caps), "paris university sex professor (free lessons)." wtf? is that something appropriate to wear in a professional setting? i mean, if that's ok, then maybe i should bust out my "plastik" anime t-shirt, which features a busty cleavage-bearing girl emblazoned on my chest and see what people think. hrmph.

have you ever seen an ant from a side view? i bet you haven't, because you rarely see one from that vantage point. from my parking lot smoking breaks, i spied a line of ants who were walking sideways (i was looking down at them, and they were on a vertical wall on the steps), and i was surprised to find out that their bodies are tilted up. i never knew that! the things you learn.

i'm excited to see _SatC_ tonight. it'll be like seeing old friends again. i'm also intrigued by the potential nudity that's going to be shown. the reviews say there's "graphic nudity," so i'm anticipating some juicy stuff. schlongs and boobs galore! bring it on! my friend will says that the movie feels long because we're used to it being a 30-minute episode, so there's a lot of dead space scattered throughout, so i hope i don't get bored. but anyways, i'll be on the lookout for some fabulous fashion. (yes, i'm a little gay like that.)

so it turns out that my brother was only able to secure two tickets to his graduation. that means that one of us (between my mom, dad and i) won't be able to attend. bummer. also, i found out that the weekend i'm in LA, dave and carolyn might be up here, so i'll miss them. double bummer. damnit, how come so much stuff happens in the bay area while i'm gone? :(

every day, i experience the power of gravity. in the mornings, after i get out of bed, within a minute or so, i feel the pull of gravity in my bowels, as it drags the matter in my large intestines to front end of my sphincter. however, before i take a dump, i have a smoke first, and very often, that cigarette is very painful, because i have to hold the shit/liquid in. i must exercise my kegel muscles a lot while i do that. today, like many times, the moment my ass hit the toilet seat, the stuff gushed out with fire hydrant force. i am going to start considering taking that dump first and having the smoke second to avoid that discomfort.

after _sytycd_ last night, i watched part of _the bachelor 3_ with andrew firestone. it was down to the last two women, kirsten and jen. it was very interesting, being in love with two women at the same time, and having to choose which one to propose to. i want to say that i wouldn't be able to do that, but i have been in a situation where i was interested in two girls at the same time, multiple times. the last time that happened was in 2000 (i think), with k3 and J. i honestly think i was in love with both of them at once. some people say that it's impossible to be that way, but i really liked both of them. of course, i wasn't dating either of them, so nothing physical happened, so you could argue that the emotion wasn't that strong. *shrug* so would i be able to have a full-blown relationship with two girls at the same time? that, i can't answer.

i did used to believe in the "two girls, 100% woman" theory. that is, you needed two girls to achieve the perfect woman. i mean, you can't expect one girl to fulfill all your needs (that's just unrealistic and puts too much pressure on the girl), so that's why you need more than one woman in your life. i got close to that 100% in college, when i was dating k1 and was close friends with H. unfortunately, spending time with the latter girl made me and k1 drift apart, so that all ended disastrously. fyi, i no longer subscribe to that theory anymore; it just makes things too complicated.

damn, so that piece of earwax i fished out yesterday disappeared. i checked the movie ticket stub, and it's no longer stuck between the folds. (however, the greasy smear marks are still there.) i was gonna take a picture of it and post it up. which reminds me, i need to schedule a physical/ear cleaning sometime soon. i wonder what my cholesterol level is. i always freak out when they draw blood. that big thick slanted needle... *shiver* what's worse is that since i have tourette's, i have to focus really hard not to tic, or else the needle will tear through my arm. (the last time they drew blood, i requested that they hold me down.)

ok, countdown to movie time!

tales from the auditory canal

i had a two-hour meeting today. i got bored after about 90 minutes or so, so i started picking my right ear. i got a pretty big chunk of earwax out, so i got pretty excited. why? because my right ear's wax has an odor (my left's is odorless. wierd, huh?) so i started sniffing it during the meeting; the scent reminded me of dried mangos. i wanted to save it, so i pulled out an old movie ticket stub out of my back pocket, folded it, and deposited the chunk inside. i just opened the stub to check up on it, and it's left two moist spots on the paper. hm. i had no idea earwax could be so greasy!

i just went down for a smoke, and one of the engineers noticed that i was wearing an abercrombie sweatshirt. he said that he also noticed i was wearing an a&f t-shirt the other day. yes, i do have a lot of a&f stuff. i shopped there a lot back in the day. yes, i know that they are pretty much racists, but what can i say, i liked their clothes. i went through phases of brand names over the years: gap, BR, a&f, tommy hilfiger (another racist), club monaco, and ben sherman. nowdays, i don't really buy clothes anymore, though. no need to; i have so many clothes i don't know what to do with them.

mikeT gives me a lot of shit for wearing paul frank and steve madden shoes. he claims they are for girls. true, i have never seen any guy but myself wearing paul frank, so maybe he's got a point. but still, i think the monkey's cool, so i'll keep wearing it. ha.

the other night, i dreamt that i was crying. it felt so real, and in the dreams, i could feel the tears flowing down my cheeks. i don't remember the last time i cried. i did feel a little bit emotional near the climax of _narnia_, though, when lucy appeared at the bridge. i don't know why that scene did it for me. but yeah, i'm not a guy who cries very often. my brother is a lot more emotional than me, though; he definitely got the crying gene from my mom, and i'm a lot more stoic like my dad.

i caught the tail end of the barack obama speech last night. it was pretty awesome. he's very eloquent, unlike the doofus we have in office right now. i just hope if obama's elected, he can actually carry through with the changes he preaches about. i will vote for him. i just found out today that he's the son of a kenyan dad and a caucasian mom. i had no idea he was only half black. (not that it matters.)

my brother's graduation is causing me to miss two birthday celebrations next weekend. i don't mind, because family comes first, but i'm just a little bummed that i can't make those shindigs. my mom still hasn't decided if she's going to be living with me for a while during her two-month stay out here in the states. i'm sort of worried, though, because her father (my grandpa) in taiwan is suffering from poor health, and i hope nothing happens to him while she's here. fyi, my grandfather is in his late 80's, i think, so he's getting up there. he's had multiple bouts of standing up and freezing, i.e. not being able to move even though his mind is telling his body to. that is some freaky scary shit.

to be honest, i'm getting tired of my guilty pleasure, _the moment of truth_. i think that's a good thing, because the game show is really trashy. the ads make it sound like the people are destroying their relationships and stuff, but in reality, it hasn't been as it seems so far this season. i think the people are more thick-skinned. i'll probably keep watching if it's on, but i will no longer schedule my life around the show. although, _hell's kitchen_ is right after it, and i'll finish watching that series.

i am craving two things today. one is normal: frozen yogurt + mochi. the second one is more exotic: the truffle oil french fries at alexander's. yum. i gotta find a reason to visit that steakhouse one of these days. those fries are fucking deLIcious, albeit at $10 a pop. what a treat!

two movies i want to see that are opening this week: _don't mess with the zohan_ and _kung fu panda_. both look funny and enjoyable. of course, i don't expect anything deep or oscar-worthy, but i just want some mindless fun. the face-kicking thing by adam sandler in the previews never fails to crack me up.

i'm seeing a lot more movies this year. in the last couple of years, i averaged maybe 2-3 movies a year. i think it had to do with having nobody to watch them with, and also the severity of my tourette's. regarding the latter, it ain't no fun watching a movie when you're freaking out about twitching next to a person who thinks you're a loony. that's why i always prefer to sit on the aisle seats, so i bother one less person, and preferably, i have a friend who knows me on the other side.

ok, 6:30. time to get me some yogurt!

movie plans

so, i finally made plans to see _SatC_. yay! if all goes well, i will see the movie thursday night with ex-coworkers adam and phuong. i hope i remember to set my vcr to tape _so you think you can dance_. i heard that there's male nudity in the movie, to which i got a lot of sour faces. i don't get why guys are so disturbed by male nudity. a lot of homophobia, i tell ya. i don't mind it at all. i mean, i watch so much porn that i'm used to it, and to tell you the truth, since i'm male and i have a schlong, it never bothered me in the first place. what's the big deal? i don't get it. *shrug*

on the flip side, i was shocked when i first saw a splayed-open vadge. i mean, i had no clue what it to expect. i remember when it happened, too; it was during a sleepover in junior high, and my friend K busted out a skin magazine, and there it was: a naked girl, with her legs spread open. i was fascinated, confused, everything. i know people say a girl's body is clean and elegant, but honestly, a girl's genitalia (when spread open) can look like a mess. so i had no idea what to make of it.

adam googled me today to read my blog, since another ex-coworker (and apparently, a long-time faithful reader, *waves to JJ*) told him that i mentioned him in yesterday's entry. i knew something was up when i saw a google search phrase with "dardy track 15" coming from the company where he's working. i am not worried about ex-coworkers reading, but i am very paranoid about current coworkers knowing that i write here. last night, at yogurtland, we were talking about blogging about work, and i reminded myself that i should stop blogging about work. i mean, at least i should stop venting about my job. at least i don't talk about stupid people or bad management or stuff like that. (i'm not saying that there is any of that here.)

are guys supposed to shampoo their pubic hair? i used to do it when i was a young teenager, mainly because i was a curious lad back then, and i enjoyed playing with that region in the shower (you know, playing with the suds and stuff like that). nowadays, i just soap up my pubic region like i do any other area (like, i don't shampoo my armpit hair, either), so i hope that's enough to keep it fresh and not musky. all the years that i've showered/been with my gf's, i've never heard a complaint about my pubes smelling bad, and my girls have never shampooed their pubes, either.

yes, i should have puked out the spider the other night. i tried coughing it out, but it didn't occur to me that i have the power to vomit on demand. ugh. i'm not sure if i had any food in my system at that point to carry the spider out with, though. it would have been pretty gross to see the insect emerge from my mouth, though. *shivers*

what is it with me and ingesting insects? i almost did it again last week. i was drinking water while taking my meds, and when i put my cup down, a flying insect floated out of the cup. ick! i almost swallowed it! i wonder why there are so many bugs in my bedroom/bathroom. it's making me paranoid. there have also been a couple of times when i'm taking a shower, and i spy a spider in my stall. i've had to turn the shower off, capture the spider, and flush it down the toilet while i'm dripping water all over the floor. yuck, i hate insects.

a big bunch of the bowling gang are doing dragonboat racing this upcoming weekend. if i can get a ride, i'd like to go watch. (it's in oakland this year.) last year, i went with grace to go watch mikeC, judy and diana do it in redwood city, and i had a good time. grace and i even got to grab dim sum at mr. fong's, which was cool because we're the two dim sum fiends of the group. i especially want to go this year because 1) i get to cheer on more friends, and 2) i've never been to jack london square in oakland.

in this past week, i've gotten 666 hits. evil! man, just over a year ago, i was getting like 18,000 hits a week. but by far, 90+% of those were from google hits from pervs and stuff; nowadays, most of my hits are from readers, so the number is far more "real."

ok, time to get out of here. last night, i got some stuff to snack on during my tv watching: honey mustard pretzels and honey dijon kettle chips. yay!

there was an old lady who...

last night, i woke up in a fit of coughing. i felt something tickling at the base of my throat. i swear it was a spider. yup, i must have swallowed a spider or something. it kept me up for about 20 minutes, coughing and making me generally uncomfortable. in the end, i got up to drink a glass of water to wash the arachnid down. ick. that's so fucking gross. *shivers* well, at least i heard spiders are a good source of protein.

one of the shows i was watching yesterday was _sport science_. it was about debunking sports myths and stuff. one of them in particular was interesting. it was about the superstition that having sex before playing sports somehow diminishes athletic performance. so what they did was have a boxer do some strength and cardio routines, go have sex with his wife, and come back and perform again. he actually performed better! and to make sure he wasn't sandbagging the first time, they measured his testosterone level. it was 25% higher. wow. so i guess at the beijing olympics, they should have a bunch of prostitutes roaming around the village so the athletes can get some before their big day. :)

last night, i was also watching part of the season one _the bachelor_ marathon on VH1. the reason why i watched it was because i thought one of the girls, shannon oliver, the second runner-up, was really pretty. (here's her personal website.) i actually linked to her site years back on my blog, and her webmaster noticed, and shannon herself wrote me a few times! i was so starstruck, similar to how i am with yul kwon. i mean, i've never been contacted by a tv personality before, especially a hot one. she was nice, and she even wished me season's greetings one year. *bliss*

i had lunch with some old coworkers from V today at the old sneha. it was good seeing adam and rahul, who i last saw back in late 2006. i paid for adam's lunch as a thank you for the stock tip he gave me the last time i saw him (i made $1K on it), and this time, he gave me another tip. i hope it's a good one. adam's investment portfolio is doing very well (over 20% yearly over the past few years), so i trust his advice. rahul told us about his paragliding outing yesterday, and it sounded very cool. i just hope he doesn't get hurt. *crossed fingers*

of course, after lunch, i got ridiculous food coma. indian food does it to me every time. i trudged from the parking lot to my usual ledge for my post-meal cigarette, which made my lethargy even worse. and then, i felt a dump coming on, so i went to the bathroom and nearly passed out on the toilet after letting loose my bowels. and then, i took a 45-minute nap in my cube.

so has anyone seen _sex and the city_ yet? is it good? tim invited me to go see it on saturday, but i couldn't commit because i thought i was going to the city with diana. i don't think i have any other friends who want to see it. the ratings say that there's graphic nudity in it, so that's got my interested piqued. do any of the main four women get naked?

man, there's no basketball to watch for the next three nights. i've been used to having at least a game to tune into for the past month or so. i really want to see kevin garnett win a championship. ah, the lakers and celtics. a classic rivalry. i was a kid back in the larry bird vs. magic johnson days, and my dad and i used to watch those finals together. it was like father/son bonding. we lived in boston for a while, so naturally i will root for the celtics. but honestly, i think the lakers are a better team, so i won't be surprised if they win it.

a few weeks ago, i went to take a leak in a public bathroom. the problem was, there were only two urinals, they were *very* close to each other, there was no barrier, and one of them was already taken. when i stepped forward, our shoulders were touching. it was very uncomfortable. but it wasn't like i was afraid of having a swordfight or anything (ok, maybe i was a little bit), but i was definitely afraid that my pee was going to go horizontal (as it often does), and i'd wind up pissing on the other guy's shoes, and he'd beat me up. so what i did was strain extra hard and force the stream out as fast as i could, and luckily, the piss came out straight. *phew*

i resolve to get some frozen yogurt today. this i say!

laid back weekend

had a pretty simple, uneventful weekend.

friday night, i had dinner at southland with paul and leeya. paul was anticipating a fun weekend; he was off to a bachelor party in vegas, flying in at 2pm on saturday and back at 8am on sunday. that was cool because he was going to stay up all night and didn't need to pack anything. woo-hoo!

saturday, i had lunch with john and grace at wahoo's in santana row. i was a bit hesitant to go there because parking at santana row is a bitch on weekends, but after a little circling around, i found a spot. grace was pushing for me to get something other than my usual spicy chicken quesadilla, so this time, i tried the spicy fish quesadilla. the fish was a little dry, and i almost swallowed a bone in the fish. never again. she pointed out that they have carnitas, though, so i'll get that next time.

afterwards, we walked around santana row a bit, and then, i jetted off to mercado to watch _narnia_ at 3pm with my coworker D. the movie actually wasn't half bad, but then again, i had no expectations. it kept my attention, and the best scene was near the end when lucy stood on the bridge. (i'm not going to spoil it for you.) it was a long movie, though, clocking in at 2:20.

then, i went home, had a smoke, and left again for dinner. leeya, mikeC, nelson and i went to one of my favorite places, pho kim long in milpitas. ah, the wonderful, splendourific #27. i had been craving this for a long time coming. funny thing, nelson got it, too, but his was way smaller but had more meat. oh well. he finished his much faster, but since i love noodles, i was glad that mine had more of that stuff.

afterwards, we hit tap ex next door, and then we went back to leeya's place and watched of _team america_. i hate that movie. the puppets sort of freak me out. the thing was, the movie was playing on comedy central, and they weren't censoring anything! wow! i waited until the sex scene (i wanted to see if they were going to cut it out), and then i left, went home, skype'd my mom, and went to bed.

sunday was utterly boring. i had lunch with D at e-noodle (they no longer have the pork/leek dumplings! or at least on the weekends, they don't). then, i went on an expedition to find red envelopes for my graduation/wedding gifts. luckily, i hit a bookstore in milpitas square that had them for 25 cents each. my chinese helped me get good service, and i bought 6 of them.

i went home, watched some television, and took a nap. i called up jeremy and jack and talked to them for like 20 minutes each. both of them had to go eventually because their kids were bugging them. sigh. man, life really changes when you have kids, i realized.

for dinner, i met up with nelson at the chevy's near winchester and 280. i got there early, so i ordered a whiskey (johnnie walker black, no more maker's mark for me), got some free chips, and watched sp