my tics are worsening. they're not as violent as they used to be, but still, they're getting more and more frequent, and more and more painful. i scheduled a massage at 6pm tonight. hopefully that'll help loosen up some muscles.
during lunch today, cute work girl was right behind me in line to get food. all i could muster up was a smile and a "hey," to which she smiled and "hey"'ed me back. damn, i couldn't come up with something clever and witty to say. arrgh. this is killing me.
there should be a class that teaches how to approach people without forcing the situation. clearly, i have not had enough experience in this. *RAAR*
anyways, what good tv is there on monday nights? i don't watch _24_, and i'm not about to start in the middle of a season, btw.
not much to say today. i think i'm still in a little bit of a shock over my roommates moving out. has anybody has experience finding roommates on craigslist? how has that turned out? any psycho stories to tell me about? i'm pretty paranoid that i'll find a weirdo to live with me, and he'll stab me to death in the middle of the night while i'm sleeping. *shudders*
man, i gotta take a piss badly.
have you ever had to take a leak so badly that when you finally do, it feels sort of like an orgasm? like, this one time when i was in san diego visiting alan, we got stuck in a blockbuster video store for a long time, and already, i needed to go take a leak. but instead, we wound up staying there for a long time, and on the drive back to his place, i felt like i was about to explode. and when i finally got to his bathroom, i let out this huge orgasmic sigh of relief upon letting it out. man!
i've noticed the my current liquid consumption gives me clearer urine. sometimes, i'm so dehydrated, and i don't have much to drink, and my piss is all nuclear yellow and stuff. but nowadays, at work, i drink like 4 vitasoy boxes and two dr peppers, and by mid-afternoon, my urine is almost clear. i think that's a good sign, right?
ok, enough talk about #1's. :)
and speaking of #2's, i've been slightly more regularly lately. i'm still afraid to take a dump at home, though, for fear of flooding the toilet. ick.
ok, i really can't take it anymore. gotta go to the bathroom. bye!
friday night, i met up with alan at mcd's for a quick dinner before he continued packing and moving.
saturday, i didn't do much in the morning. i met up with alan and ting at posh bagel for a quick lunch, and then i spent the afternoon watching college basketball games. then, i met up with cindy at maples and watched stanford totally dominate oregon. yay!
i was supposed to go up to the city to see jay and alex (who was in town from LA), but i had a headache and was tired and not up to driving up to the bubble lounge by myself. sigh. i really wanted to see alex, though. but i had a quick dinner (note: nearly all my meals this weekend were quick fast food) and went to bed.
sunday, the absence of roommates really hit me hard. i was pretty depressed for most of the day. i tried calling a lot of people, but got mostly voicemail. i did talk to jeremy for half an hour and gina for 15 minutes. i met up with jimmy at korea house for a long dinner, though. ah, meat! panchan!
and that was it as far as my weekend went. truly sad times, living alone. i think i've decided that i'm going to try looking for a roommate because i simply don't want to move. we'll see how that goes, and whether i get a psycho roommate. *knocks on wood*
so my work buddy W is a good wingman. today, during the company lunch, i came in late. but, by the time i got my food (which was horrible), i saw him sitting down next to the cute work girl's group. W was thinking ahead!
so i sat down across from W, and made some smalltalk with this guy from the girl's group. it turns out they're auditors for the company, and they'll be here until MARCH. yup, i've got a few months to work this thing! woo-hoo! i was afraid that they were going to be out of here this week, since our company has reported the numbers for Q4 of '04.
i made eye contact with cute work girl a few times, and she smiled at me. that made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.
so praise W! although, in order to get to sit next to them, he had to let another coworker in on the secret crush to explain why he chose to sit there instead of another free space in the large dining hall.
so i'm feeling happier today. of course, i don't know her name yet, and i haven't actually *talked* to her, but i feel like i'm slowly and steadily getting my foot in the door.
ok, on another note, tonight is the last night that i'll have roommates. yup. alan and ting are moving out tomorrow, so i shall cherish this night. they've been great roommates, and if you can't tell already, i love alan to death. i shall miss his company and his presence. *sniff*
i hope stanford beats oregon tomorrow. i'll be at the game, and if we lose, i'll be very bummed out. i'm going with cindy. she has a lot of errands to do beforehand, so i hope it all works out and we arrive at the game (and find parking) in time to see the tipoff.
my skin has been breaking out like crazy. i've got patches of eczema (at least that's what i think it is) all over my face. it's ugly! and it itches! i keep scratching it, so i have red marks on my cheeks and around my left eye. luckily, i'm seeing a dermatologist next wednesday, so i can get some ointment for this stuff.
yesterday's _OC_ was so-so. i thought caleb was being an asshole, and that pissed me off. and what is this lesbian tension between marisa and alex? i think the show is getting desperate. although, i thought seth's drawings of summer were really good, and i secret root for them to get back together. we shall see next week.
it will crush me if cute work girl isn't single.
but anyways, i hope to make more progress next week. and with that, i'm off. have a good weekend folks!
i timed my morning piss yesterday. one minute, 15 seconds. that's one hell of a leak! i guess that's why they say you're dehydrated in the morning.
not much happened today. i did have lunch by myself downstairs; cute working girl didn't show up, and my usual eating buddy (william) was nowhere to be found. i haven't had a meal by myself in a long time; this time, i just occupied myself with the newspaper.
i just got assigned another block to do at work. sigh. all this pressure! this is not the easy-breezy job that my manager told me it would be. yuck.
now here's a humdinger... on the days when i'm alone (i.e. alan and ting are gone, and thus not taking showers), the hot water runs out pretty fast. however, when they're around and take showers in the morning, the water during my pre-going-to-bed showers is nice and hot and lasts a long time. what gives? wouldn't you think that being by myself would result in me getting the whole tank of hot water in the water heater?
all of this just means that once they move out this weekend, i'll no longer have vast amounts of hot water at my disposal to enjoy. blech. i love hot, scalding showers! i think it's a remnant of going out (and taking showers) with k2; she loved water so hot that it hurt.
my neck is still bothering me. stiff, it is. i'm contemplating getting another massage to try to ease it away. in the meantime, it hurts to turn my head to the right. ouchie!
my dad forwarded me some of the e-mails that have been going on his end. it looks like my mom is really really weak and in pretty bad shape. :( the most frustrating thing about this is that no one knows what is wrong with her. i'm really worried. worried, worried, worried. if something happened to her, i think i'd have a complete meltdown. sigh.
ok, i have to cut this short because i really don't feel like talking right now. i guess i'm still feeling down about life, and we'll see if tomorrow doesn't cheer me up, being friday and all. i'm out.
i'm not enjoying _scrubs_ as much as i hope to. maybe i'm not in a laughing mood, or perhaps the writing has gone down. but last night's episodes of _scrubs_ and _committed_ were just rather blah to me. hm.
my tics are weird these days. i don't do the twisting to the right tics anymore, but instead, i crunch towards the left. it aggravages my stiff neck (yes, i still have it), so it's rather painful. yuck.
not looking forward to the weekend. saturday, i'm going to help alan and ting move, which depresses the hell out of me. the end of an era, for sure. i wonder how much i'll see them after they move out; couples that live together tend to sequester themselves on an island, and i just hope it doesn't turn out true for those two.
it's amazing how intelligent our sphincters are. i mean, that muscle can differentiate between solid, liquid and gas! yesterday, i had an urge to fart, but i immediately could tell that it wasn't gas that needed to be let out. so i ran to the bathroom, and had a nice episode of the runs. weird, how my body does that sometimes.
not sure what else to blog about today; i've been feeling down lately. no doubt a large part of it has to do with my roommates moving, but i just don't have much to look forward to. getting out of bed has been harder every day. :(
it's not like i don't have stuff going on. this weekend, i'm attending a basketball game; next weekend i'm going throw a superbowl party, and the weekend after that i'm going to a taiko concert. so there are things to do, but i just feel all *blah* about them.
maybe i should go back on antidepressants. *ponder*
it's weird, because when i was an only child growing up, being alone didn't bother me. it was the only way i knew how to exist, i.e. playing or drawing or reading by myself. but nowadays, i'm find myself actually feeling *lonely*, and that really sucks. it bothers me, seriously.
what happened to my previously independent self?
maybe i am feeing the biological drive, the drive towards hooking up and cohabitating and nesting. maybe i just feel like it's time to find somebody. hm.
anyways, before i bore you to death, i will sign off. have a great day everybody!
i had a run-in with cute work girl's coworkers during lunch. i made a snippy remark about them shunning the cafeteria food, which could have led to some more conversation, but william and i left before i could figure out what else to say. dammit, i missed out! i should have waited for her to come out and carry on more conversation. i hate it when i look back on a verbal exchange and feel like i should have done more. *sigh*
so the moving has begun. i helped out alan last night; he rented an SUV in exchange for bringing his car into the shop, and i helped him move his two big TV's and some other stuff. *sniff* i'm going to miss him (and ting) when they're gone. the reality of it all is settling in. i'm going to be alone. :(
ting made a comment like, "you guys don't get much quality time in," referring to the times when he's working and i'm watching television. but even though we're in the same room and not talking, it still is comforting to know that alan is *there*. oh well. hopefully alan and ting don't disappear like the other couples once they're gone; i'll be sure to hound them to hang out.
not much going on today. my neck still hurts like a motherfucker. and i'm meeting up with the yujster tonight for dinner and an exchange of cash for two stanford men's basketball tickets for saturday's game against oregon. $52 well spent for cheering on my alma mater.
i wonder if i should start buying lottery tickets. true, chances are, i won't win, but it's the *opportunity* of a multimillion dollar upside that makes me dream of someday becoming financially set for life. what a dream that is! i'd quit this job, find something i truly love to do, and go about doing it. now wouldn't that be nice?
anyways, i'm putzing around right now. dinner with yuji is at 6:15, and i'm debating whether i should just go home now or wait and go straight from work. too bad it's raining out there; it dampens my spirit.
so after alan moved his two tv's out of our place, my 27-inch (which was formerly in my bedroom) television is now the main screen downstairs in the living room. so what do i do for sleeping with _sportscenter_ on? i'm using my dinky 13-incher in my bedroom. it doesn't have a secondary input, so i can't watch my porn in my room anymore! shucks.
hm. i have half an hour to kill. *ponder*
i wish love were more often than not a mutually felt emotion. that would simplify my life a lot. :/
hm. my project lead (cubicle neighbor) is thai, and she just gave me a thai treat. it tasted like slightly sugarized fried egg yolk. can't say that i liked it, but it was definitely interesting.
my stiff neck came back in full force today. i found it hard to rotate myself in bed this morning without painful spasms shooting down my neck and shoulder. shit! normally, i'd set up another appointment with my chiropractor, but i don't want to face him and have him lecture me about going on that no-carb diet. :(
i had something rant about today, but i've forgotten what it was.
does being older make a person more susceptible to digestive tract problems? i've noticed that in the company bathroom, a lot of the older men have a lot of gas and diarrhea. hm.
anyways, not much to write about today. i'm going home soon, and i still haven't figured out a way to talk to cute work girl. ok, the problem is, she works in a conference room with other people, so there's no way to catch her by herself. and i am NOT just going to waltz in there and ask her out in front of her coworkers. that's death!
and every time i see her, she's flanked by coworkers, even walking to and from lunch in the downstairs cafeteria. so basically, i'm fucked unless i want to make a fool out of myself and put her in a difficult spot too.
so who's your pick for the super bowl? i like both teams, so this year, it's going to be hard to root for anyone. maybe i'll just sit back and enjoy the game this year without taking sides. i hope there are some good commercials this year, too.
last night, i put some icy hot on a region between my left shoulder and the left side of my neck. it HURT. like, it felt like the region was on fire. how is this supposed to help my aching stiff neck muscle?
it reminds me of this one time when i was much younger, and i read about putting tiger balm on one's penis somehow being pleasurable. so i found this similar stuff (it was called like white lotus balm or something), and i put some on my schlong. damn, that was an excrutiating hour or so afterwards. nothing could stop the burning! i even took a shower, but it did nothing to help ease the crotch fire that i had going.
anyways, so that was an embarrassing story. and it concludes my blog entry for the day.
sigh, an era is over. this was the last weekend that i had with alan and ting, who are moving out next weekend.
friday night, we had a quick bite at subway before they headed up to the city for a housewarming party. i stayed home and watched some NBA action; the suns/spurs game was pretty good, except for the suns losing. why do i root for the suns? because they have steve nash from my mavericks. he's a good scrappy player, and some say he's an MVP candidate.
saturday, i woke up at 1:30 and watched stanford narrowly beat USC down in LA. it was a good game, too, and i'm glad that we seem to be playing well.
then, it was off to the mission district in the city for peter's birthday dinner at cha cha cha. i called it, though, as alan, ting and i sat at one side of the table and talked amongst ourselves while the rest of peter's medical doctor friends gabbed it up. we felt pretty out of place, which was amplified even further by the horde of people who surrounded our table. we should have been only able to seat 9 or so, but there were way more than a dozen people packed into the space.
i wasn't impressed by the food, either. peter was nicely drunk, and i'm just glad that he had a good time.
sunday, i watched both the NFC and AFC championship games. the teams i picked both won, so that was a good thing. but now, i don't know who to root for. eagles or patriots? i don't know. i just wish for them both to play their best, and may the better team win the super bowl.
our final dinner together was at sneha. truly the end of an era, as i said. i told alan that i would have gladly paid extra in rent to keep him around until june, but he said it was just wrong in principle. i suppose so, but that just goes to show how much living with him means to me. sigh.
so yeah baby, the stanford cardinal have won three straight basketball games, beating good teams like arizona and ucla! luckily last night, i was able to watch the first part of the first half and the finale of the game, sandwiching _the OC_, which i didn't like too much.
not sure what's going on tonight, but i'm looking forward to the weekend. this will be the last real weekend and i'll have with my roommates; they plan on moving out next weekend. sigh. *sniff*
so let me talk about the difficulties of approaching the cute work girl. first of all, she doesn't have a cube; she works in a conference room with other people, and she looks busy all the time. and at lunch, she goes down with a bunch of her coworkers, so it's impossible to get one-on-one time with her. sigh. what can i do??
i like her hair. it looks soft. god bless dark hair! i love it.
anyways...
i plan on watching the stanford vs. USC game this weekend, hopefully with yuji and company. i also plan on watching both NFC and AFC title games on sunday, which means i'll be planted in front of the tv for most of this weekend.
i want to do my taxes. these past few years, i've done them online, and it never takes more than an hour. the problem is, i don't know when the tax info will get mailed to me, and soon enough, i'm moving, and i don't know my future address for them to mail me the refund. so i think i'm stuck waiting until 1) i get all of my documents in the mail and 2) i move to the new place.
i've been trying to extend time these days. what i mean is, when i'm snoozing for 9 minutes in bed or having a cigarette break, i try to slow down time and concentrating on everything i do. that way, time seems to last longer, and my breaks from life seem more punctuated. i don't know if this makes any sense.
the sun seems to be rising earlier and earlier. at first, it was around 7:30 or so, but nowadays, it seems like it gets light soon after 7. drat! that means i get half an hour less of good sleep. damn this haldol side effect!
so my chiropractor and chiropractic neurologist gave me a call today. they want to know how my no-carb diet is going. i didn't answer my phone, because i don't have the heart to tell them that i am unable to cook for myself and go on the diet. sigh. they're convinced that my tourette's is caused by carbs (more specifically, an allergy to gluten), and i just have a hard time believing that my tics are manifestation of a "bad" diet. hrmph.
i can't imagine life without carbs. i love (white) rice, tortillas, dr pepper, etc. too much to give them up. but, still, the thought that i could ("could" being the operative word) be tic-free is definitlely attractive. so that's why there's still a glimmer of a chance that i'll try out the diet. someday.
ok, that's enough from me today. have a STUPENDOUS weekend, folks!
hm. so the current thinking is that the cute girl at work is a contractor, doing some finance stuff for the company. so that means: she won't be around much longer! damn, i have got to find a way to talk to this girl. yesterday, we did a deliberate walk-by in the cafeteria, and noticed the didn't have a ring on her finger. of course, that doesn't preclude her having a boyfriend already...
i don't like this season's _alias_ very much. it's too episodal, and there's no main plot driving the season. it's pretty much a reset to their SD-6 days, and i find that boring. still, though, the thought of them injecting ice-5 into vaughn's eyeball sort of freaks me out, as if needles didn't already make me edgy.
tonight's a television conflict: i can either watch the stanford/UCLA game or _the OC_. i think i'm just going to watch the latter and catch the front and tail ends of the basketball game. sigh, i hope the team does well without me cheering them on. ha! as if that matters...
i was supposed to meet up with yuji and steve to see the game somewhere, but it turns out that the yujster has some business to take care of. oh well. 'twould have been fun, i suppose.
but, i might be seeing a stanford game live at maples! yup, if all goes right, i'll be attending the stanford/oregon game on january 29th. yippee! i can't wait to see the newly renovated maples pavilion.
cheer up! it's thursday! that means tomorrow will be over in no time, and the weekend will start!
we had our monthly ice cream social today. being in a weight-gain mode, i had FIVE scoops of the stuff: 2 green tea, 2 cookies and cream, and 1 cookie dough. good shit, man. of course, i went down there hoping that cute work girl would show up, but alas, no sighting.
this weekend, i'm headed up to the city for peter's birthday dinner at cha cha cha in the mission. i'm sort of not looking forward to it, though, because it'll be mostly peter's doctor friends, who i don't know. doctor friends are sort of annoying because all they do is talk about work, which is a conversation topic that i can't contribute to. *sigh*
damn. my fingers still smell like the carnitas quesadilla that i had for lunch. we made a la bamba run (mountain view), but i wasn't feeling up to tackling an entire burrito. so i got a quesadilla instead. yum, cheeeeeese.
sigh. not much else going on today. my stiff neck is still killing me, and my tics these days aggravate the condition. yuck.
you know what's been getting on my nerves? the laughtracks in sitcoms. ANNOYING. often, they launch the laughtrack when somebody says something that is completely unfunny. what is up with that?
funny, though, because i've asked ting and alan about it, and they don't even notice the laughtrack. but it's so OBVIOUS to me. hm.
well, today's been boring, as usual. i did roam around the 2nd floor with my work buddy, looking for the cute girl's cube. maybe it turned out for the best, but we didn't find her. we do have a clue to who she is, though, because one of the female cubes was empty, and it points favorably to her.
sigh. i don't know what i am doing. it's too hard (or unlikely) to stage a random bumping-into. i need divine intervention!
i miss the dorm atmosphere of meeting girls. back in school, it was easy to meet people and talk to them. nowadays, i have to resort to stalking? say it ain't so!
i got an e-mail from k4 today. apparently, she got pissed/turned off when i sent her an e-mail after our dinner at masa's. she thought that i expected her to put out simply because i splurged on our meal. which is COMPLETELY NOT TRUE. i would never expect sex just because i took a girl out to a nice fancy dinner! so i'm glad i got that all cleared up; i was puzzled a bit as to why she blew me off, and now i understand why.
so i watched the first half of _american idol_ last night. it's always amusing to see people sing badly, although it's sort of disturbing that many of them think that they're actually good. i mean, don't these people have a clue that they suck? you hear a good singer, and then you hear a bad singer. it's pretty obvious then, isn't it?
so on a completely different topic, different guys have different tastes in women. i find this interesting. this point was reiterated to me when mike was telling his gf that he and i diverge in our tastes. i thought about it for a while, and yup, it's true. although, he said that we sort of agreed on one girl, but i think we actually agree on a few more. heh.
but it's a good thing, i think, that different guys like different girls. otherwise, we'd all be chasing the same women! ha!
but yeah, i am still picky as hell these days. i wonder when my (shallow) standard will let down a bit due to desperation. so far, it hasn't happened yet, and i think it's dooming me to a life of eternal bachelorhood.
anyways, i am still waiting for a hot reader to find my blog, fall in love with me, and ask to meet me. heheeeh. what a fantasy, huh?
i was telling amy that i need more drama. my life is sooo boring and devoid of drama, it makes me feel empty inside. life is nothing with drama, you know?
ok, time to do some more work. toodles!
i'm deciding whether or not to follow season's _american idol_. it'll be a tuesday night commitment, which is already taken up by _scrubs_ and _committed_. hm.
last night, i met up with adam on castro street for some dinner. or, rather, he had a big wet burrito, and, seeing as how i already ate, i munched on some chips and had some water. i still paid $1 for tip, though. afterwards, i got some pearl milk tea. roasted barley, yum.
not much going on today. i am still trying to figure out how to meet the girl at work. no, i am not stalking her; i am not going to do anything to make an uncomfortable situation or get me fired for sexual harassment. :) i just want to talk to her, that's all...
to clarify, H (one of the girls i went up with to the city on saturday night) is a girl that i hooked up with for one night my junior year. i was completely drunk, and after hanging out in the lantana lounge, i led her to my room, and soon enough, all of our clothes were off and we were in bed. no, i did not have sex with her, but we got close. so that's why i was a bit apprehensive about interacting with her again.
during the drive up, she mentioned how we went to the AASA semi-formal together. that sent up alarm sounds in my head, because she could have easily followed up with the memory of our one-night stand. luckily, she didn't. :)
anyways... that's that.
one thing i don't get is how much good pens cost. like, a mont blanc pen runs well over $100! and in japan, i think i spied a pen for a MILLION YEN, which is roughly $10 grand here. how can a simple writing instrument cost so much? i mean, is it really worth that much? sheesh.
i guess the same goes with watches. i mean, yes, i do wear a tag heuer watch, but it wasn't a really expensive one, and most of all, i got it because i liked the color. (the face is bright yellow. yippee!) but still, if you're talking about rolexes and stuff, i just don't understand how the marginal "betterness" or a watch can be worth that much.
i am not looking forward to living alone. i mean, after alan and ting move out, i'll have run out of stanford buddies to live with, and i am very reluctant to get a random on craigslist or something. so that means... yup, living alone. the horror. i know i liked it when jay moved out a few years ago, but nowadays, it just reeks of loneliness and solitude. sigh. *sniff*
alan says that he's moving out to save about $1200. (that's based on six months times the $200 savings he'll get on rent.) but i'd gladly pay him that amount (even more) to keep him around for another six months. of course, he wuoldn't let me do that on principle, but that's how much he means to me. sigh. it's weird to know that i'm sort of codependent on a male roommate.
hey ann, e-mail me! i want to talk.
anyways, i'm going home soon. sigh. that means scrounging around for dinner and eating by myself. i used to be really good on my own, but these days, i guess seeing everyone else in a couple is starting to wear me down. :(
oops. i took a leak in the 1st floor bathroom, and i wound up dribbling piss all over my pants. it looks like i soiled myself pretty bad... next time i need to remind myself to hop around and shake it well! maybe next time, i should bring along an extra change of underwear. hehe.
not much going on during this monday. sigh. mondays suck.
so E picked her car last night from my place. i am still kind of miffed that she didn't know her tolerance and got so sick from those two kamikaze shots. of course, though, i do take some responsibility because i was the one who bought her the second drink. sigh.
it was sort of stressful finding the first exit on the 101, because i took the south san francisco off ramp, and i had no idea how i would get back to the highway. luckily, the on ramp wasn't too hard to find afterwards.
i'm really sad. alan and ting found a place this weekend, and they're moving out in two weeks. i've thoroughly enjoyed living with alan (and ting, later), and i have this sinking feeling that i'll never have a roommate again, much less live with alan again. he's been a great guy to live with, and i understand that we all have lives and futures and stuff, but still... i'm just sad that it had to happen.
so i saw the cute girl at work today in the cafeteria. i think we made eye contact, but still, i have to be more proactive. it's just that i have no "in" to meeting her except for random happenstance. it's not like i can roam the second floor (i work on the third) looking for her cube and come up with some excuse to talk to her. hm.
i want to thank you guys for your comments on A. (even though i think it's rather uncool to not leave a name or an e-mail address) i don't think she's a bitch or anything. she's a sweet girl from what i know of her. maybe she just got freaked out by something i said, who knows. i'm kind of clueless as to what happened, and i'd like to know what it was i did that drove her away.
peter's birthday dinner is coming up. it's at cha cha cha in the mission on saturday night. i'm sort of not looking forward to going there because it'll be a bunch of doctors in the mix, and i don't converse well with doctors. they just seem to talk about work, something that i have no idea how to contribute to. oh well. it's peter's birthday, and as long as he's happy, i'm happy. :) i just hope he gets a lot of use out of his gift that alan and i bought.
i keep trying to grow out a pinky nail. it's not for sniffing cocaine, by the way. it's for scraping out my ear wax. haha. but, as the nail gets longer, i can't resist biting them down. yeah, i'm a nailbiter. although i don't bite them to grotesque short lengths like i used to. i just trim them with my teeth, that's all.
ok, that's enough for today. laters!
so friday night, i met up with ting and alan at shoreline theater, and we watched the horrible movie _elektra_. man, what a waste of money.
saturday, i woke up at 12:30pm, and i waited for cindy to come over so we could watch the stanford/cal men's basketball game. we shared a sausage, mushroom and jalepeno pizza; she had three slices, and i had five. it was a good game, and it was good catching up with cindy over three cigarettes each.
i took a nap on the futon while listening to the NFL playoff games afterwards. then, it was off to the city with my friend H and her friend E, but not before a quick dinner at queen house.
i was a little hesitant to call up H because of our history, but in the end, it turned out OK. we went up to the city to see funk u, a band that featured my friends rainbow and aileen. the venue was the DNA lounge, where i saw funk u in their debut. the band performed well despite half the members being struck with the flu.
E had two kamikaze shots, which was enough to get her pretty drunk. H stayed in the city, so I drove E back (her car was parked at my place). however, 10 minutes into the drive, i had to exit highway 101 to find a place for her to puke. and then, 15 minutes later, i had to exit again, so this time, i just gave her my garbage bag to puke into. she was heaving for the entire rest of the ride back, poor girl.
once we got to my place, she went into the bathroom twice to try to puke up the rest of her alcohol, so there was no way that i was going to let her drive home. so in the end, she left her car at my place, and i drove her home to cupertino. i was kind of upset about that, because i really wanted to sleep but my conscience got the better of me. i did a good deed. :)
sunday, i went to the mall with alan to get peter's birthday present. and we actually met up with peter there, too, so we hung around the banana republic after having a quick lunch at mcdonald's.
then, it was off to nola on palo alto for jimmy's birthday dinner. it was a strong showing of 18 people or so, but i have to say, the food at nola was pretty bad. the gumbo was disgusting, and skirt steak i got was kind of tough. the only good thing about the meal was the pecan pie. ahh, pecan pie!
and that was it for this weekend. i feel like i did a decent amount of stuff, but i just didn't get enough sleep on saturday night.
i'm very happy it's friday. yippee! in a matter of a few minutes, i'll be out of here.
i spied a decently attractive girl at work today during our company lunch. the next question is.. how do i meet her? i don't even know where she sits, probably on the 2nd floor somewhere (i'm on the 3rd). and i don't know if she's taken, either. sigh.
anyways, my neck is STILL bothering me. what the fuck? i've never had a stiff neck that lasted this long.
alan's coming back today! we're going to see _elektra_, which seems like it would suck badly. ting chided me yesterday for wasting my money by going with alan to see these shitty films, but i don't mind. i think hanging out with him is going to be a top priority for me now that i know he's leaving. it's kind of sad that i don't appreciate my time with him until it's too late.
it's like the last night the three of us (alan, jeremy and me) had at brenton. after moving a lot of our stuff out, the three of us had a beer in the backyard. and we realized that it was the first time we were doing that (i.e. drinking beer and talking), and it made us sad. i gotta savor my time with my friends because in the end, they all leave me. :(
so it turns out my boss isn't leaving the company after all. all these people threatening to quit and not carrying through with it. i mean, i am personally glad that they're staying, but i am also concerned about these resignations because it shows that nobody is happy here. sigh.
hm. how to approach that cute girl at work? i may be getting ahead of myself here, but i don't even know the company's policy about dating a coworker. do most companies ban it? or at least frown upon it?
i am craving junk food right now. which is weird, because i hardly snack or eat junk food. maybe i'll get a snickers to tie me over. that stuff is filling! it truly satisfies!
i had another dream about k1 last night. in it, she handed me a sheet of paper with a snippet of a free-verse poem that i wrote, and she wrote an extension of the poem criticizing me of going out with k2. weird, i know.
i've decided that if i could get women easily, i'd be a serial monogamist. yup. i mean, i've been happy with being single all these recent years, but deep down, i think i crave companionship. and of course, i crave sex, too. hehe. who wouldn't?
i liked last night's episode of _the OC_. i like how the plot flows in that show, and they resolve everything in a happy knot by the end. i'm tired of cliffhangers and stuff, a la _alias_. it makes me sort of uncomfortable, wondering what'll happen next and having to wait a week to find out.
anyways, i'm out soon. see you guys monday!
i wonder if my body is absorbing more nutrients from the food that i eat. if so, then that explains why i take dumps so infrequently nowadays; i go every 2 or 3 days!
my stiff neck is still there. it's not as bad as it was before, but still, i've skipped basketball this whole week because of it. hard to have court awareness when you can't turn you head, ne?
anyways, _alias_ has been disappointing lately. it's like they reset the whole show back to the beginning, and none of the backstory means anything now. oh well. i'll still watch it, being the obssessive-compulsive guy that i am. :/
i tried jack in the box's southwestern chicken pita yesterday. i wasn't bad! i usually shun black beans like they are the plague, and i have to admit, i didn't like them in my pita, but the other stuff (tasty chicken, roasted corn, grilled onions) made up for it. my only concern is that it's low in calories, and i'm trying to gain weight.
the weekend's almost here! i've got a birthday dinner to go to and a stanford basketball game to watch. not to mention all the football playoff games. yup. alan flies back tomorrow, too, so it'll be good to see him. (he's been in miami the entire workweek for a conference or something.)
i was lamenting to my friend alex about how i'm the last single guy in our drawgroup, and he mentioned how it's only fitting that i get married last. why? because i'm the youngest of the group, and unlike the other guys, i'm not a "serial monogamist."
i dunno though. i have grown increasingly worried about how picky i am about girls. i mean, if i weren't so damn persnickety about women's looks, i'd most likely have a girlfriend now. but i remain shallow and picky, and thus i'm still single. damn. how long do i have to go before my standards let down a bit?
alex is a great e-mail buddy, btw. i love writing him and reading what he has to say. too bad i'm such a lazy ass, or else i would have visited him in LA already.
i wonder if i would be as reticent if i were a girl. what i mean is, i write girls randomly all the time. like girls i see on friendster, old acquaintances, etc. but i hardly hear back from these women. maybe they think i'm a freak or something or writing them without being prompted. but i figure, if i were a girl, i'd be a nice person and at least write back. hrmph. !!
anyways, there's this band playing in the city on saturday. i'm tempted to go, since two of my friends are in it. i just wish i had somebody to go with; showing up at a concert/party all by my lonesome is a situation that i try to avoid, lest i become a complete wallflower. if anybody wants to go, give me a buzz!
ok, i'm going to do some coding now. see you later.
eww. i just picked off a scab on my head. !!
i still got the stiff neck. it kills. i even scheduled an appointment and saw my chiropractor today, but what he did to me only felt good for a few minutes. and now my neck is back to its painful self. :(
i had some interesting sleep last night. i remember being curled up in my wonderful blankets like a burrito filling, and then i just sailed away into sleepyland. i dreamt about playing the Game (this 24-36 hour scavenger hunt with clues), but that's all i can remember. and of course, i woke up at 7:30 again and couldn't fall back asleep. i fucking HATE that.
last night, i picked up adam for dinner. first, we were going to go to tung kee, but midway through the drive there, i called and audible, and we went to the cupertino miyake instead. we both got about $20 worth of food, and i was thoroughly satisfied with my 20 pieces of sushi. hm. $1 per piece. seems kind of expensive still, doesn't it?
i watched _committed_ last night. i thought it was sort of amusing. and the girl seems sort of cute, so maybe i'll continue to watch it. i can't believe the guy cleaned his apartment so drastically, though... yeah, i'm a stickler for reality, even though i watch ridiculous shows like _alias_.
i had something interesting to say a while ago, but now i've forgotten it. shucks.
i think A is ignoring me. which feels kind of bad and confusing, because i don't know what i did. but so far, i've IM'ed her quite a few times, and written her a few e-mails, and no response. i wonder what gives. sigh.
i'm excited for the colts/pats game this weekend. gotta find out when it is exactly so i can schedule around it. my dream prediction for the super bowl? colts over the eagles. i like peyton manning, and i think he deserves to win one.
ouch. i need for this stiff neck to disappear. it's hampering my happiness.
it's amazing how much energy costs. my PG&E bill went up by almost 100% from october to december. true, i was home for half of december (and thus turned the heater on during the day), but still, $95 (instead of $53) for energy is a whopping total, especially for a relatively small place like mine. hm.
ok, that's it for today. i'm off to take a break. toodles!
i woke up this morning with a totally stiff (and painful!) neck. as it stands, i can't turn my head more than 45 degrees to either side. ouchie!
not much going on today. just got out a 1+ hour meeting that was totally pointless. oh well. the only big news was that my boss is leaving the company, and that's a true bummer because i came here partly to work for him specifically.
damn, my neck hurts. i wonder if it had anything to do with the massage i got yesterday. my masseuse came back from her vacation in china, so i called her up and got a nice half hour massage. but maybe that loosened my muscles so much that they got tweaked while sleeping. either way, life sucks right now with this stiff neck, so much so that i didn't even go play basketball today.
i can't stand brown rice. my roommates cook it because it's healthier and more tolerated under the south beach diet, but damn, it tastes like shit! and it's all crunchy and stuff. ick.
you know what song is in my head these days? green day's "boulevard of broken dreams." i just like the opening melody, and it gets stuck in my head and can't get out.
sigh. tuesdays. tuesdays really suck. not to mention there's no _scrubs_ this week. instead, they've got this new show _committed_ on nbc at 9:30. how is that show? is it worth watching?
i would like to get more e-mail, especially from you readers. so if i know you, drop me a line! and if i don't know you, i'd especially like for you to drop me a line. meeting my readers makes me happy!
anyways, that's it for today. i'd post up a google phrase of the day, but no interesting search phrases have been coming up. i guess since my blog died back in february, i haven't been talking about grotesque or kinky sex acts. :)
so friday night, i picked up ting and alan. happy joy! they had only had rice and noodles during their thailand trip (except for one pizza meal), so we went to in and out burger for a bun fix. we each ate two burgers, and i had a vanilla shake on top of that.
saturday, i got up early (meaning: noon) to watch stanford beat the arizona wildcats at maples. that was a good game. then, i watched football for the rest of the afternoon. for dinner, we went to mcd's and then hit krispy kreme donuts, where i had three hot, fresh glazed donuts. yep, i'm trying to keep my calorie intake high.
afterwards, we headed over to shoreline to watch _million dollar baby_, which was a good film, despite being sad and depressing in the end. sigh. spinal cord paralysis is such a nasty thing to go through.
sunday, i watched some more football. i met up with mike at 3pm over some roasted barley pearl milk tea at tea era; we caught up and took a walk to the bank. it was nice seeing him again.
at 5, dishi and barden and sharon came over, and we headed up to the city to meet up with kara. we did it dine about town-style, which mean a three-course meal for $31.95. the venue was this modern vietnamese place called ana mandara in ghirardelli square, and the food wasn't half bad. i had a jameson on the rocks to take the edge off of my tourette's, and i even got a little empty stomach buzz off of it.
all in all, i nice relaxing weekend, although it was (as usual) too short.
what a waste of a week. i guess part of it is the remaining inertia after a two-week hiatus, but damn!
wow, it was windy last night. it was howling in my bedroom, making it even harder to sleep than it normally is. drat. this rain is pretty depressing, i must admit. and it's going to keep on raining through the weekend.
anyways, i am itching to leave. i want to curl up on the futon and take a nap before picking up ting and alan at the airport. but :) :) :) i'm going to have roommates again! they're coming back! yippee!
lindsay, the new girl on _the OC_, is growing on me. not that she's hot or quirky or anything, but i am just starting to like her more. i guess i have a weakness for redheads. fire crotch!
tomorrow is what would have been my 9-year anniversary with k2. not that it means a whole lot, since it's been five years since we've gone out. but i wonder if we had stayed together, how things would have turned out. would we have gotten married by now? would we have kids by now? hm.
i think my ban on beef is slowly dying. it is just too convenient to eat beef, vs. avoiding it and trying to eat dishes that don't have it. like today, we had mexican food for our company lunch, and i had beef enchiladas simply because they looked good and were there. *shrug* BSE, here i come!
i just wonder if 5 years from now, there will be a whole slew of people diagnosed with BSE. that would scare the crap out of me, and i would be paralyzed with the fear that i'd come down with it as well.
do fingernails have any calories?
i think i'm denial that my roommates are moving out. i still haven't faced the fact that i'm going to be living all by myself in a month or two. i think i'm consciously avoiding it because i know it will stress me out.
i send out way more e-mail than i get back. what gives? shower me with love, people!
i am wearing a black shirt today. and i shouldn't. why? because every time i run my fingers through my hair, these white dust particles come flying out. i don't think it's dandruff, though; i've never had problems with an itchy/flaky scalp. hm.
whatever possessed van gogh to cut off his own ear for a girl? sheesh.
ok, so long folks! have a STUPENDOUS weekend!
so last night's _alias_ was sort of disappointing. i was expecting this whole elaborate deal with last season's cliffhanger, but it turned out to be a lame thing. sigh.
i'm excited for tomorrow. why? because ting and alan are coming back! yup, i'm going to pick them up at the airport after work, and like i said, i am going to give very big "welcome back" hugs to both of them. what a great way to end the week and start the weekend.
wow, this year's football season came and went by in a flash. it seems like only yesterday that i headed up to the city to visit hr girl in week 1 (we watched a part of the opening day festivities in an irish pub), and now, the playoffs have started! man! has it been 17 weeks already?
life without roommates has been boring and lonely, i have to say. the tv has been my best friend for these days. i learned over the break that _dawson's creek_ reruns show on TBS at 11, and i had been getting up early to watch them. it's like seeing old friends again, joey, pacey and the gang. man, i miss that show.
anyways, i gotta make a better effort to see people. i wonder how i'll do when i live alone once alan and ting move out. like i said before, i enjoyed living alone once jay moved out at the old place, but for whatever reason, i'm more attached to my roommates this time around. maybe it's because i consider alan my best friend, and living with him has been quite a privilege. he's been my roommate four times!
my sleep schedule has been screwed up by people waking up early in my complex. like today, at the bright early time of 9 or so, this dude decided to bust out his circular saw and carve up some wood. how annoying is that.
i think i have a thing for well-groomed eyebrows on a woman. i still consider her eyes to be the primary focus when looking at a girl's face, and good eyebrows are sort of like a frame for those eyes. a nice arch, a well-plucked tapering, good thickness, it's all just very good stuff.
i was watching the _sports illustrated_ swimsuit model search last night, and i didn't think any of the girls had that something special. oh well. my chance for gawking at some good eye candy fell flat.
so who's the girl from the upcoming season of _the bachelorette_? she looks familiar, but i can't place her. is she from one of the older shows?
and don't worry... i pine-sol'ed the downstairs bathroom yesterday. no more shit remnants on the floor. :) my roommates will be able to roam around with bare feet no problem, haha.
gonna be a late night for tonight. why? because the _alias_ season premiere goes from 9 to 11! i'm also taping it for ting and alan downstairs; i will enjoy watching the episode from bed, to maximize sleep. :)
lately, i've been going to bed at around 8:30. of course, i don't fall asleep until much later. damn this insomnia!
anyways, not much going on today. i had beef stroganoff for lunch at the company cafeteria. sigh. i think my anti-beef kick is waning, and i'm doomed to flirting with acquiring BSE.
i got an angry e-mail from k4 today. it was a surprise. what happened was that i wrote one of her friends in friendster and mentioned how i took k4 to masa's, whereby she blew me off at her graduation (and afterwards) the next day. she took it as an intrusion of sorts. sigh. i think it was a misunderstanding; i was merely trying to make conversation with this new girl, and it blew up in my face.
oh well.
i have got to get some work done.
you know what annoys me? people who drag their feet when they walk, such that their heels slide along the ground as they take steps. it is a sign of laziness to me somehow, and it gets on my nerves. trudging feet, yeah.
sigh. break was too short. i would have preferred to have a whole month off. speaking of which, i haven't had a whole month of vacation since i started working back in 1997. how nice would THAT be?
reminder to myself: pinesol the bathroom. you know, because of the shit water flooding and all. i hope i get this done before my roommates come back.
so i'm looking forward to picking up ting and alan at the airport friday night. it'll be like getting reacquainted with long lost (good) friends. i expect myself to give a few big hugs. *bliss*
my time left with them is very precious. i want to hang out with them as much as i can before they move out. and i predict a lot of sadness (even tears?) when they finally leave.
anyways, this is as much as i can muster. today (this week, too) has been very slow, and that leaves me with little to say. so... toodles!
not much going on today. i did play basketball (although i almost flaked out), and while i was very rusty and defenseless (as usual), i did score the winning bucket in the last game. that felt good, i got a few high-fives afterwards. :)
i've been writing for most of today. no, not blogging, but going through my friendster and orkut galleries and writing people. it sounds sort of pathetic, but damn, meeting people is really hard, especially for a homebody like me.
i'm going home soon to watch the national championship game. of course, i am rooting for my pac-10 league USC over OU. it should be a good one, though, as four of the five heisman finalists are in the contest.
so i finally got off my ass and made an appointment to see my dermatologist. it's slated for february 2nd. damn, she must be busy and stuff to have such a backlog of patients. go figure, i suppose.
i got some mentions of disgust over my toilet flooding incident. hey, i just tell it like it is. i do wonder, though, how thick the pipes are that lead away from the toilet; i've had some pretty thick dumps before! it must not be that hard to clog that shit up.
speaking of dumpage, i haven't been very regular. it used to be that every day, i would go #2 in the morning, within half an hour of getting out of bed. nowadays, i can go for maybe two days without having to take a shit. weird, huh? i wonder what changed in my system.
i'm mad at NBC. they pulled _scrubs_ from their lineup tonight! *RAAR* so the 9:30 slow is some new show called _committed_. hm. i wonder if i should watch it; i saw some ads for it, and at least it seemed amusing.
tomorrow night is the big _alias_ 2-hour premiere. i am dying to know what sydney uncovered about her dad and her past. *itching*
so my friend told me that pearl milk tea is falling out of favor, i.e. it's getting old. according to him, no one in taiwan drinks that stuff anymore, so i wonder when it's going to wear out its welcome out here in the states. i can't imagine life without pearl tea now that it's here, but truth be told, i *does* feel like it's getting saturated out here. too much supply, and not enough demand!
speaking of which, i'm going to try to grab some pearl tea to go along with the wet burrito i plan on ordering tonight. being a basketball day, i skipped lunch as usual, so now i have to get all of my calories from one meal. sigh. this can't be good for me.
ok, i'm headed out. take it easy out there, folks.
so i'm back at work, and nothing is happening today. tomorrow is basketball day, and despite my lethargic attitude, i am thinking of playing. i've been on a basketball hiatus for over a month now, and i wonder how hard it will be to run up and down the court again.
i miss alan and ting. last tuesday, i dropped them off at the airport, and this friday, i'm picking them up. i can't wait to have roommates again. i've lived alone before, and i liked it back then, but now, with their impending departure come february, i am dreading being alone. alone, bored, and lonely.
so i saw two movies by myself over the break. and second one was _closer_, which i had high expectations for. it turned out to be nothing special, despite portraying natalie portman as a stripper. i thought she had a nice ass, but they didn't show any other part of her naked body. :( rats!
yeah, _closer_ was just a bunch of dysfunctional relationships. i didn't even think the acting was all that great, so i guess i am saying i don't understand what all the critics were hyping. *shrug*
sigh. back at work. i can't even being to describe how bad that makes me feel.
at least i'm blogging again, right? *half smile*
i had a dream about k1 last night. can't remember any details, though.
oh, and sleep is still going badly for me. this light sensitivity thing really blows, and on top of that, it takes me a long time to fall alseep. damn this insomnia and haldol side effect! last night, i got into bed around 7pm (yes, damn early), and i didn't fall asleep until around 10 or so.
my sports teams are doing badly. last night, the dallas cowboys handed eli manning his first win (booo), and i also watched stanford get swept by the washintgon schools. losing to a ranked washington squad was one thing, but washington state? man, we suck!
i need a visit to my dermatologist. my skin is in BAD condition. i think i'll call them after i finish this entry. the only thing is, PAMF is backed up, and i'm anticipating a wait of like two months before i can see dr. rothman.
oh, don't tell my roommates, but i flooded the toilet with a monster dump last week. like, the water ran over the toilet seat and soaked part of the hallway and living room carpet. luckily, i am fairly certain that it was almost all water, and very little shit particles (if any) made it onto the floor.
now, i'm paranoid about flooding the toilet again. it's a thing of horror, flushing with a piece of poo in the toilet and watching the water level rise and rise to no end. yes, i had a plunger, and it just wasn't working!
and don't ask me why, but i SMELLED the plunger. and of course, it smelled like shit. i even stuck it too close to my face and got some plunger wetness on my nose. ewww. but anyways, that was a pain in the ass, and now that i'm working again, i will try to take my dumps at work, where the toilet flushes are much more powerful.
did jack shit this weekend. thursday night, i met up with geoff and walter at harry hofbrau's for a supremely hearty turkey enchilada. but then, halfway into the meal, i realized that i had to go home to watch _the OC_, which turned out to be a repeat. GLARG. so i missed out on some good dinner time with two friends.
friday afternoon, i headed up to the city to visit emi and shoji and her family. we had mochi, watched a taiko video, had dinner, and played trivial pursuit. damn, after my unbeaten streak ended at trivial pursuit, i am now winless in my last two games. sigh. i guess i am getting stupid.
i headed home before midnight struck. by the time 2005 came, i was in bed.
saturday and sunday were spent lying on the futon watching television. i did do an errand yesterday, though, and bought lightbulbs, a jamba juice smoothie, and a big mac. and that was IT as far as getting out of the house.
i sorely miss my roommates.
and yes, i'm back at work now. it sucks. fucking sucks.