i left the house twice yesterday. the second time was to get dinner. and the first was to stop at safeway and get some icy hot.
are you guys familiar with icy hot? it's this gel or waxy stuff that you put on your body, and it just burns. it's allegedly supposed to roast away the soreness in your muscles if you are achy and stuff. and being sort of achy all the time, i thought this would be a good thing to have.
my roommates smelled the stuff on me when we were watching _alias_, and alan mentioned two places to never apply icy hot: 1) your balls. and 2) your armpits.
hm. perhaps he has experienced both of them? and said experience was traumatizing? hehe.
anyways, back when i was a kid, we used to have tiger balm, which was a similar kind of substance. and there was yet another similar ointment called "white lotus" or something like that.
well, i had read somewhere that applying tiger balm to one's penis would produce a fantastic sensation. so i took the white lotus and spread it on my shaft. and it FUCKING BURNED. and looking back, it was even more painful than when i got a blowjob from a girl who had just eaten indian curry!
anyways, i had to hop in the shower and stay there for half an hour while the balm worked itself off of my schlong. but boy howdy! it was one of the most painful half hours that i've ever had.
i should be more stressed out than i actually am. is that bad?
yoshinoya's just ain't yoshinoya's without their beef stringies. i got their chicken & vegetables today, and the whole thing just left me wanting more. damn those stupid prions!
back to talking about work... i'm usually pretty good about breaking up complicated tasks into much smaller, easily-solvable ones. i think that's my "gift" so to speak. but the problem is, some problems are just gargantuan, and modularization isn't very apparent. and that's where i'm stuck today. and it really sucks.
so the thing is, most tasks don't scare me. but, once in a while (like today), i am face to face with something that does frighten the bejeezus out of me. the last time this happened, i went out and bought a sleeping bag because i knew i'd be coding all night long. shit, i hope history doesn't repeat itself.
it sucks to live in fear. work should NEVER do that to somebody.
when it think about it, i find it mind-boggling that we can put together "arbitrary" letters and numbers and random punctuation together and create something amazing. something like a brilliant novel, a beautiful poem, or, in my case, a chip that actually performs a useful (and hellafucking complicated) function.
now, i'm at the beginning of putting such letters, numbers, etc. together, and i find it rather daunting. why? because i don't know how to even begin to assemble these things together!
i have liz phair's "extraordinary" stuck in my head. why? because it's the theme song for espn's presentation of the ncaa women's basketball tournament.
what's sort of silly is that the next line in the lyrics (which they obvious don't feature) is:
average everyday sane psycho
ha!
so work is going to get very busy for the next few weeks. against my wishes, i got assigned this crazy packet mode transfer block. it'll be a doozy, and i just shudder when i think of how complicated it's going to be. sigh. i SO need a vacation from all this coding!
so yeah, the college basketball season is over for me. i'm gonna miss talking about it with my friends, and hanging out at spoons (thought their food is mediocre) with yuji and company. all the hype and excitement? gone.
getting to work at 10pm today was pretty painful. i wish i could tell my superiors that i *need* the extra sleep because i have a "medical" condition, but i don't think it would fly.
mondays do suck, don't they? i have very little to look forward to on mondays, except sleeping during the night. there's nothing on tv, even, when i get home, and i spend my nights reading my magazine, which is such a fucking chore sometimes.
i have to admit that i've been feeling down lately. not nervous breakdown-down, but i've noticed several times during the past few days that i've been very listless and sort of morbid at times when i've been by myself. the good news is, though, that i know i've been through this before, and that i'll most likely get out of it just fine. eventually. but right now, things just aren't very fun.
so friday night, we had korea house (i got spicy bbq pork) and headed off to the movie theater to watch _spartan_ on my recommendation. hey! i thought david mamet made good movies (_wag the dog_, _the spanish prisoner_), but... man, this one was pretty bad.
saturday, i woke up at 1:55pm, and headed over to watch the debacle of 2004: of course, you guessed it, stanford, #1 team in the nation, losing to #8 seed alabama after leading by 13 with 7 minutes go to. what a choke/meltdown!
i wish i could come up with a good reason why we lost, but it was just a terrible performance in the end. we fouled way too much, we couldn't score, etc. *sigh*
afterwards, howie, yuji and i went to shoot some hoops ourselves to get some aggression out, and that was fun. we played various games, like horse, around the world, free throw contest, 3-pointer contest, free throw streak.
apparently, alan had a plan to break me and my beef avoidance, so he got some fred's steak. and what did i do? I ATE IT! yep. i had beef. but just this once. we invited betty over to help us tackle the 4 pounds of meat, along with the huge salad she brought.
sunday was moping day. i watched basketball from the moment i woke up to about 7pm. the fact that the overall #1 seed (kentucky) lost as well made me feel a *bit* better. i had two arby's chicken sandwiches for dinner, watched _alias_, and that was it. a good day of doing nothing.
how are my tics doing? they're still there, but they hurt slightly less. so maybe i'm on the road to recovery? hm. i wouldn't bet on it.